Dan Vs The Demon Sisters
by EverSoNitro
Summary: After Dan's apartment building gets bought out and he's given less than a month to move out, Dan swears revenge on the two new owners. But, things aren't what they seem, and Dan is forced into a fight between angels and demons, with the world at stake.
1. Prologue

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Prologue-

It was a typical morning for Dan. He awoke as sunlight streamed in through his dingy window, finding a gap in the blinds to travel through, and shone directly onto his face. His eyes slowly opened, then quickly snapped back shut. He grumbled to nobody in particular about somehow blowing up the sun for hurting his eyes, then found the strength to rise up out of bed and go to the kitchen to get something to eat. He stepped around a broken lamp that in the past had hung over his bed, the fixture now having found a new home on the floor after a fit of rage from its owner. Opening the fridge, he found that there was still some cake left from Chris's birthday party that had taken place the previous week. As he picked up a piece in his hand and began eating, he reminised about said party. He had gotten Chris an authentic spy micro walkie talkie that he instructed him to keep on his person at all times, in case kidnappers ever took one of them (probably Chris) hostage and destroyed their phones to keep from being traced. Dan had taken the cake when Chris and Elise refused to reimburse him for the walkie talkie. Hey, it's not like he was made of money, Dan wasn't about to just give stuff away. Oh well, he thought, at least they remembered to use non-dairy milk to make the cake. They had probably forseen that Dan would crash their party, but come on, it would've just been Chris and Elise there if he hadn't, what kind of a party is that?

Dan finished his makeshift breakfast and headed out the door. Locking it behind him, he took a look around, to see what fresh nuisances the world had cooked up for him today. The first thing he checked was his car, which had a habit of attracting all sorts of trouble for him. A quick inspection told him that there were no signs of damage aside from the usual dents, scratches, and missing parts. Satisfied, he climbed in, attempted to start the engine, got out, kicked the car, clutched his hurting foot, got back in, and successfully started the car. Checking to make sure no pedestrians were trespassing behind his parking space, he pulled out, and headed down the road. As he drove past his apartment building, however, he noticed something unusual next to it. A new, much taller building had been erected next to it. Looking at the large sign next to the main entrance, he read "Démon Arms Apartments". A small banner underneath it advertised that they would begin accepting tenants within the coming month. "Heh, Demon Arms," Dan chuckled, mispronouncing the building's name. "Sounds pretty sinister, probably won't be too many people moving into that place. They don't even have a parking lot! Where do they expect people to park?" Dan laughed at the assumed stupidity of whoever owned the building. He then continued on his way to Chris's place, for a day of grocery shopping, movies, and eating out (all on Chris's dime, of course).

The sun was much lower in the sky by the time Dan returned to his apartment. He drove past the new building a second time, and chuckling at the error they had made regarding the parking situation once again. It had been a decent day, all things considered, Dan thought. He only got in a two minute fight with the attendant at the supermarket regarding the stock of lactose-free milk, the restaurant gave him a free bowl of soup after he complained about the temperature of his original bowl, and he got ejected from the movie theater half-way through the movie, much later than usual. All in all, it was a good day. Dan locked up his car and proceeded up the stairs to his apartment, ready to crawl into bed and rest for tomorrow. As he approached the door, however, he noticed a note had been afixed to it. Dan didn't think much of it, however. "Stupid solicitors, leaving their garbage on my door," Dan grumbled. "Obviously they're new here, or they'd know what happened to the last guys that tried to get me to join their stupid charity run." Dan snatched the note off the door, crumpling it up and putting it in his pocket, and turned the doorknob to walk into the apartment. Right here, Dan sensed something was amiss. Hadn't he locked the door before he left this morning? Suspecting that there might be burgalars inside, Dan rushed back to his car and grabbed the crowbar he kept in his trunk. He scooted back up to the door, and slowly pushed the door open from the side. He didn't sense any movement from within, so Dan proceeded cautiously inside, crowbar raised over his head. He made a few sweeps of the house before he decided that nobody was inside, and began checking to see if anything had been stolen. Nothing seemed to be missing, but he noticed that a few things had been moved, as if they had been picked up, examined, and put back in approximately the same place. Dan scratched his head, wondering what had happened, and he suddenly remembered the note that was posted on the door. He fished the now crumpled note out of his pocket, and began searching for clues as to what had transpired. What he found though, was so much worse.

The note read as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam

We are happy to announce that your building has been bought out by the Démon Arms Apartment Corp., in order to make space for a parking garage for our newest apartment building. In light of this, we are requesting that all tenants of this building move out of their apartments by the end of the month, so that we may begin demolition of the building, as well as construction of the garage, as soon as possible. In your absense, we have personally conducted an examination of your living conditions, in order to evaluate whether or not you will be a suitable tenant for our apartment. You will recieve the results of your examination in the mail within the next week.

Sincerely

The Démon Sisters, owners of Démon Arms Apartments

The last sentence of the note was scratched out, however, and written underneath it was what appeared to be the results of Dan's inspection.

This is, quite frankly, the most disgusting apartment we have ever seen. There will be no need to wait for the results of your examination, because I can quite safely say that you have failed spectacularily, Sir or Madam. Please vacate this building by the end of this month.

Miss Scanty Démon

Dan could hardly believe what was happening. "This is ludicrous!" Dan shouted, crumpling the paper in his hand. "They've got no right to do this to me! They can't just boot me out of my home!" Dan was storming around the apartment, kicking various pieces of clothing and garbage everywhere. "I've lived here for years and suddenly they just want to turn my apartment into some guy's parking space? This will not stand!"

Dan clenched his fists in rage. Some way, he would be sure to get back at the people responsible for this. He looked at the note again, looking for the signature that would tell him the identity of his newest enemies. He located it, and engraved their identity into his mind. He threw his arms up into the air, and, after a quick intake of air, he bellowed at the top of his lungs.

"DEMON SISTERS!"


	2. Chapter 1

**Dan Vs The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter One-

"Get out here, you fiends! I will not stand for this blatant thievery of my home!"

Dan was standing out in front of the Démon Arms Apartment building the next day, throwing rocks at what he assumed was the window of the main office. There were two problems with this strategy, however. First, most of the rocks he was throwing landed slightly off target, either hitting the building surrounding the window, or landing in the street in front of it. Second, the room the window belonged to was, in fact, the security office. Dan hurled another stone glass-ward, and the rock managed to meet its target, leaving a sizable hole in the window. "Ha!" Dan shouted trumphantly. "Take that, you scoundrels! You no-good crooks!"

A security officer looked out of the hole and noticed Dan. Glaring angrily, the officer quickly dissappeared from the hole, and a second later, dashed out of the main entrance. Looking around, he spotted Dan. "You there!" The officer shouted. "Stop right where you are!"

Realizing that he was out of rocks, Dan quickly made a run for it, the officer in hot pursuit. After about ten blocks, the officer lost sight of Dan. Giving up, he began heading back to the building. Once the officer was out of the vicinity, Dan peeked out of a nearby dumpster. Believing that the coast was clear, he climbed out and stood in the alleyway. After picking a stray banana peel off of his shoulder, and muttering something about clichés, Dan fished his phone out of his pocket and called his trusted partner, Chris.

Chris was sitting at home, watching TV with Elise, when his phone began vibrating. An uncomfortable buzzing sensation shot through his leg as the phone vibrated in his pocket, causing him to yelp and jump up. Elise looked up, wondering why her husband jumped up so suddenly. "Jeez Chris," she joked. "I didn't know you were this into The View."

Chris chuckled at his wife's joke. "No, no, it's just Dan," he replied, seeing his friend's angry face staring back up at him from the phone's screen.

The smile slid from Elise's face. "Oh." She said flatly. "Whatever it is this time, you can't help him, we were going to spend today together. WITHOUT Dan."

"I know, I know," Chris said, answering the phone. "Hey Dan, wha-"

"Get over here now, Chris!" Dan shouted from his end, as he walked back to his apartment. "I need you to help me get back at a couple of theives."

"Wait, what?" Chris said, surprised. Usually it was just some minor issue Dan hassled him about. "Theives? What did they steal?"

"They stole my apartment, Chris!" Dan shouted. "Some sleazy jerks bought out my building and are making me move out! Get over here so you can help me think of a way to get back at them!"

"Alright, Dan, I'll be right over, and we can figure out what you're gonna do about-" Chris heard a long beep, signifying that Chris had hung up on him. He turned to Elise. "Sorry, honey, I've gotta go. This sounds pretty serious, I've gotta go help Dan."

"Alright, just be back before dark, and don't do anything illegal," Elise replied, pecking her husband on the cheek. "I'll see you later."

"Don't worry about a thing, I'll try to keep Dan from pushing me into something stupid." Chris headed out the door. Elise shook her head. Whenever Dan came up with some silly revenge plot, Chris always found a way of getting into trouble.

Chris arrived at Dan's apartment, and Dan answered the door. Before Chris had a chance to step foot inside, Dan immediately thrust a crumpled piece of paper in his face, the note that Dan had found on his door earlier. "Look at this!" Dan said. "Can you believe it? They want to make my apartment three street-facing parking spaces on level B!"

Chris took the note and began reading. "Man, that's tough," he said, looking it over. "What are you gonna do about a place to live? I could probably talk to Elise, and we could let you stay in the guest room until you find-"

"I'll tell you what I'm gonna do!" Dan said, interrupting his friend. "I'm gonna make those Demon Sisters wish they hadn't messed with me and my living arrangements! Now, take me down to the hardware store, I need you to buy me some explosives."

"Whoa, Dan, settle down," Chris said. "Before we do anything drastic, why don't we just talk to them and see if they won't just leave this building alone, or at least let you live in their building?" Chris paused for a moment. "And I think it's pronounced 'Démon'."

"You saw the note. Apparently, I didn't pass their stupid 'examination'." Dan said. "I'm telling you, we should just blow up that building of theirs and be done with it."

"I'm pretty sure that's VERY illegal," Chris said. "Besides, there's the possibility that you'd do damage to your apartment in the process."

Dan thought for a moment. "Yeah... I guess you're right. I wouldn't want to go through with it just to end up with a giant hole in my cieling. Fine, we'll try it your way." Dan huffed.

"Glad you see things my way," Chris said. He looked at the note again, and located the number for the head office. Dialing the number, he brought the phone up to his ear, only to have it snatched away by Dan.

"You listen to me you-" Dan began as someone picked up on the other end. "Oh, it's automated," Dan realized. He tossed the phone to Chris. "Here, you take it, I'm no good at reasoning with machines."

Chris took the phone and followed the instructions to talk with someone. Eventually, he reached through to a secretary.

"Hi there, my name is Chris, I'd like to talk with one of the Démon sisters, if that's at all possible." Chris said. "Really? That's great, thanks!" Chris waited for a moment, Dan glaring up at him all the while. "Hello, Miss Démon? Yes, my name is Chris, I'm calling on behalf of a friend of mine, you recently purchased his apartment building, and he's quite upset. Uh huh. Okay. Really? Yes, that works for us, thanks! Alright, thank you, good bye!" Chris hung up the phone.

"Well?" Dan said.

"They've agreed to speak with us in person, they're going to meet us tonight at seven o'clock at Chéz Soirez. Dinner's going to be on them!" Chris explained. "They seem pretty generous, don't you think?"

"Yeah, real generous, other than the fact that THEY'RE KICKING ME OUT OF MY HOME!" Dan shouted.

"Alright, alright, we'll talk to them tonight. Just find something fancy to wear, and I'll meet you back here at six thirty to pick you up."

"Why can't I come pick you up?" Dan said. "Why do I have to be rushed to get ready?"

"Well... these are probably sophisticated people, Dan, to be treating us to a place like Chéz Soirez. I don't think we'd be making the best impression if we showed up in... your car."

"I'm coming to pick you up, end of story." Dan said. He then turned his back to Chris and scanned his apartment. "I think I have a suit around here somewhere..." He muttered to himself.

"Alright, fine, I'll just head out then." Chris headed toward the door. "Oh, you don't mind if I take this note to show Elise, do you? It might help my case if I have to convince her to let you stay with us."

"Go ahead, take it, I don't care," Dan said, rifling through a pile of clothes.

"Alright, thanks," Chris said. He then headed out the door and climbed back into his car.

Chris arrived back at his house about ten minutes later. He walked in and gave his wife a hug. "Hey honey, I'm back," Chris said.

Elise pecked Chris on the cheek. "Hey there sweety. So, what'd Dan want?"

"Oh, somebody bought out Dan's apartment building and now he has to move out." Chris said. "It's all in this note," Chris handed the crumpled note to Elise. "Dan and I are going out to talk to them at seven, they're taking us to dinner at Chéz Soirez. Do I have a suit somewhere?"

Elise was looking at the note Chris gave her, and barely noticed Chris's question. "Huh? Oh, yeah, it should be in the closet."

"Thanks, honey, and sorry you can't come." Chris said. "They didn't specify whether or not we could bring guests, and I don't want to cause any issues with these people." Chris hurried into the bedroom.

About a half hour later, Chris walked out, wearing a smart-looking suit and tie. "Well," he said to Elise. "How do I look?"

"You look very handsome, sweety," Elise said, giving Chris a kiss. "You two have fun, and I hope you can work something out with these people."

"Alright, honey, I'll-" Chris was interrupted by a honking from outside, followed by some muffled shouting. "Oh, that'll be Dan now," Chris said. "I'll see you later, honey!" Chris quickly kissed Elise and dashed out the door. Elise watched him climb into Dan's car from the window, and watched the two of them pull away. As soon as they rounded the corner, Elise pulled out her phone, and dialed a number. A deep voice answered on the other end.

"Hello, Father?" Elise said, looking at the note Chris gave her. "I've located them, send out the troops."


	3. Chapter 2

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter Two-

Dan and Chris pulled up outside of Chéz Soirez, the restaurant they were to meet the Démon sisters at. Dan looked at his watch; the time was currently ten to seven. He and Chris looked around idly, before Dan finally spoke up.

"So where are we supposed to park?"

As if in answer to his question, somebody knocked on his window. Dan gave a startled jump, and smacked his head on the ceiling of his car. Dan grumbled as he rubbed the top of his head, and rolled down the window. "What do you want?" Dan said to the man.

"Your car, sir?" The man said.

"What about my car?" Dan inquired.

"Dan, this guy's a valet," Chris explained. "He's here to park your car for you."

"Him? Alone in my car?" Dan said incredulously. "That's just like asking for it to be stolen! I can find somewhere to park myself, thank you very much." Dan pulled forward, and began driving up and down the street looking for a parking space. After a good twenty minutes, Chris was starting to get anxious.

"Come on, Dan, just let the guy park your car!" Chris moaned. "I promise you that he won't steal it!"

"No way, I'm not letting him anywhere near my car." Dan said. "And besides," he continued, pulling his car to the side of the road across the street from the restaurant. "I just found a great parking space!"

As the two climbed out of the car, Chris noticed a fire hydrant being blocked by Dan's car. "Uh, Dan..." he started, but Dan was already making his way over to the restaurant. "Hey, Dan, wait up!" Chris said, hurrying after his short friend.

The two walked into the restaurant, and Chris let out a gasp of amazement. "Wow..." Chris said, admiring the interior decor. "This place is pretty fancy, huh Dan?"

"Of course it is, these people are just showing off by inviting us here," Dan said, irratably. "We could've just gone to a fast-food place, or even to their office, but noooooo, let's drag the peasants out to a five star restaurant and rub their noses in our fabulous wealth!"

"Now that's hardly fair, Dan," Chris said. "Only you could read something like this as an insult."

"Fine, whatever, but I can guarantee you that these people are gonna be high society snobs that wouldn't even talk to us under any other circumstances." Dan said. The two of them then stood and waited to be directed to their hosts.

"Can I help you two gentlemen?" A man behind a podium said. He was holding a clip board and a pen.

"Yes, we're here to have dinner with the Démon Sisters," Chris said, before Dan could find an excuse to start yelling at him.

"Ah, you must be Mr. Chris and his friend," the man said. "If you'll follow me, the Démons have had us prepare a private room for the four of you this evening." The man gestured for Dan and Chris to follow, so Dan pushed his way in front of his taller friend and the two began following the man. They eventually reached a door that read "V.I.P. Dining Room 2", and the man opened it, gesturing within. "If you'll have a seat, the ladies will be in shortly. They are currently freshening themselves up."

Dan simply marched inside, while Chris uttered a thank you before walking in. The two of them took a seat at a solitary table within the room. Inside, they noticed two doors leading to private washrooms, as well and a door leading to the kitchen. There was also a man playing a violin, but neither Chris nor Dan paid him much mind. Dan drummed his fingers on the table impatiently, while Chris began lecturing Dan. "Now Chris, you have to behave yourself tonight," Chris began. "No death threats, no swearing of vengance, nothing. These people are currently the deciding factor on whether you get to keep your apartment or not, so it's important that you make a good impression."

"Yeah, yeah, I gotcha." Dan said. "But if they refuse to leave my building alone, there's gonna be some serious hell to pay, belie-" Dan stopped as the doors to the private washrooms opened simutaniously. Chris and Dan both looked across the room, and out from the doors stepped two women. The one on the right was a well proportioned woman with long hair running down to her lower back. The other was a somewhat more slender woman wearing glasses with her hair done up in a ponytail. Both wore very official looking uniforms, but what seemed most unusual to Dan and Chris was the colour of their skin, as well as what was on their heads. Both women had deep red skin, approximately the colour of a tomato, and both had what appeared to be horns coming out of the top of their heads, the right woman having two smaller ones that protruded to either side, while the left had a unicorn-like protusion that extended about half a foot. The one on the left began to introduce themselves.

"Good evening, gentlemen," the woman said. "I am Miss Kneesocks, and to my left is my dear sister, Miss Scanty."

"It is a pleasure to meet you both," the other, now known to be named Scanty, continued. The two walked over and took the two seats opposite Dan and Chris. "Why don't we order before we begin discussing business, hmm?"

"Uh, that'd be great," Chris said, somewhat nervously. "I'm Chris, I'm the one that talked to you on the phone, and this is my friend Dan. He's the one who-"

"Who's extremely angry about what you two are doing to my apartment!" Dan interrupted. "You! Scanty, was it? How dare you-"

"Dan, please!" Chris hissed. He turned back to the Démon sisters. "I'm sorry about Dan, he's got a bit of a temper."

"Oh, that's quite alright," Scanty replied, waving her hand as if she was shooing away the apology. "We all get upset from time to time, and you friend's foul mood is understandable, given the circumstances." She and he sister picked up the menus in front of them. "But we'll discuss that after we get our dinner ordered." Kneesocks rang a bell sitting in front of her, and a waiter came rushing out of the kitchen. The four ordered their meals, Chris having ordered a rather large steak, and Dan, after a small argument with the waiter over the lack of burgers on the menus, had a pasta dish ordered for him by Chris. The waiter took the menus and went back to the kitchen, and the four began talking once again.

"So, how can we help you gentlemen this evening?" Kneesocks said, folding her hands on the table in front of her.

"Well, as you're probably already aware, you two recently purchased the apartment building my friend happens to be living in." Chris explained.

"Ah, yes, Casa Paradisio," Scanty said. "It was a relatively cheap purchase. Please, continue."

"Yes, well, you bought that building," Dan said, "and you instructed Dan to vacate the apartment by the end of the month. Anyway, we were wondering if you could allow Dan to continue living there, and find a different location to build your parking garage? He doesn't exactly have a lot of options when it comes to finding a new place to live."

The two ladies paused for a moment, both seemed to be thinking. Finally, Kneesocks spoke up. "You have our sympathies, Mr. Dan, but I'm afraid we can't allow you to continue to stay in that building. We need that land for our garage, the aren't any other convinient places to put it. I'm sure you understand."

"Well, then why don't you allow him to live in your building?" Chris offered.

"We'd be happy to allow him to stay at the Démon Arms," Scanty said. "Provided his apartment passes our examination-"

"Yeah, I know all about your 'examination'," Dan interrupted. "How dare you come into my apartment without my say-so! I'm absolutely certain that constitutes breaking and entering, and I've got half a mind to call the police on you two! How do I know you two didn't take anything?"

"Mr. Dan," Kneesocks said, a hint of irritation in her voice. "I think you'll find that, as the owners of the building, and your current landlords, it was well within legal limits for my sister and I to enter your apartment. And quite frankly, I find it quite insulting that you'd accuse us of theft-"

"You want to know what I find insulting?" Dan cut across. "I find what your 'dear sister' wrote about my apartment to be very insulting! I happen to think that my apartment is perfectly fine. It certainly isn't 'disgusting', like you said in that awful handwriting of yours-"

"That was your apartment?" It was Scanty's turn to interrupt. "Quite frankly, sir, I don't know how you can live in conditions like that. There was garbage everywhere, the clothes that weren't scattered on the floor were in a giant heap in the corner... come to think of it, I think I saw that suit your wearing on top of a pizza box with discarded chinese food scattered all over it."

"Dan, tell me you washed that thing," Chris said, eying Dan's suit.

"Of course I did," Dan said, crossing his arms. "I'm not a filthy animal."

"Well, you certainly wouldn't know it from that hovel you live in," Scanty said. "And if that's how you live, then I'm afraid we simply can't allow you to live in our building. We have a reputation to keep up, and allowing a tenant to treat one of our apartments like you treat yours would be unacceptable!"

"Treat your living space with respect!" Kneesocks recited. "That is one of our RRUURRUUS!"

"Quite right, dear sister," Scanty said, nodding. "Now, I can tell that you aren't happy with this whole situation-"

"Gee, you think?" Dan interrupted.

"SO," Scanty continued. "We might be willing to give you some money for you to put towards a new living space, as compensation for ejecting you from your home."

"Forget it!" Dan said, standing up. "I don't want your charity, and I don't need it, because I am not going to be moving out of my home! Mark my words, Demon sisters, you haven't seen the last of me!" Dan began heading for the door. "Come on Chris, let's go!"

"Already?" Chris asked. "But we haven't even gotten our food yet-"

"I think it would be in everybody's best interest if you two did leave," Kneesocks cut across. Both her and Scanty looked to be getting rather mad. "I apologize that this meeting didn't go quite as smoothly as we hoped, but your friend has made it quite clear that he does not wish to share our company for much longer."

"Alright," Chris got up out of his chair. "It was a pleasure meeting both of you, and thank you for meeting with us, Miss Demo- sorry, Miss Démon."

"Oh, it's quite alright," Scanty said. "As you can probably imagine, people make that mistake quite frequently."

"Yeah, whatever, let's go!" Dan said. He stormed out of the restaurant, with Chris following in his wake.

"Dan, I am very disappointed with you," Chris said as they exited the restaurant. "You were completely out of line back there-"

"Me!" Dan said. "They're the ones kicking me out of my apartment!"

"Be that as it may, I still don't think you should've- Dan?" Chris suddenly couldn't see Dan anymore. Looking around, he eventually located Dan running to his car, which was being hitched up to a tow truck.

"Hey!" Dan shouted to the tow truck driver. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Look buddy, you were blocking a fire hydrant." The driver explained. "You can't park your car next to a fire hydrant like that, it's against the law."

"I don't see any fires!" Dan shouted. He ran to the back of his car and began tugging on the rear bumper. "Give me back my car!"

"Dan, just let it go," Chris said. "I'll call Elise and have her pick..." Chris trailed off as he heard the sound of an engine roaring building up in the background. He looked down the street and saw a vehicle screaming down the road. As it got closer, it looked like it was headed right for Dan! "Dan! Look out!" Chris shouted. He raced forward and pushed Dan away from his car. The two of them landed on the sidewalk, just as a hot pink jeep plowed into the back of Dan's car. The cable snapped on the tow truck, and Dan's car landed down with a thud. The tow truck was knocked about fifty feet down the road. It sped away in a panic, as if fearing more cars to come driving down the road like that.

Chris and Dan both gave their heads a shake, then looked up. Three figures were standing around the two vehicles, inspecting the damage.

"P-p-p-panty," one of them, a red-headed boy in a green jumpsuit, stammered. "You really should watch where you're going!"

"Oh, shut up, Geek Boy," another one, a blonde girl in a red dress, spat. "We needed to get here quickly, and we did! Simple as that!"

"Man, I'd hate to be the guy who owns this beat-up piece of junk," the third, a girl with long black hair, said. "You really did a number on the rear end."

"Hey!" Dan shouted, standing up and dusting himself off. "That happens to be MY beat-up piece of junk! And you just about killed my friend and I! How in the world did someone as stupid as you get a license anyway?"

The blonde girl spun around on the spot. "You'd better watch your fuckin' mouth, shorty!" She shouted. "Unless you want to see how far I can drive the stick-shift of this thing up your-"

"P-p-panty! Settle down!" The red head quickly said. He turned to Dan. "Listen, we're all really sorry about your car," he said apologetically. He began rifling around in his backpack, and pulled something out of it. "I was wondering, have you seen these two anywhere lately?" He showed Dan a photograph, and displayed on it was a picture of the people Chris and Dan had just finished speaking with.

"Them?" Chris said, looking at the photograph. "We were just talking with them no more than three minutes ago! They're in there!" Chris pointed over to the restaurant.

"No shit?" The blonde, who seemed to be called Panty, exclaimed. "Awesome, thanks!" She pulled a gun seemingly out of nowhere (to which Chris jumped back behind Dan in fear), and looked over to the other girl. "Come on, Stockin'! Let's go deal with these bitches!"

"Right behind you!" The girl said, producing a katana in a similar fashion. The two raced into the restaurant, with the boy following just behind them. Chris looked extremely scared.

"Oh boy, I think I just did something stupid." Chris stammered. Dan, on the other hand, looked angry.

"If those two think they're getting their hands on those Demon Sisters before I do, they've got another thing coming!" Dan said. He quickly ran after the group back into the restaurant.

"Dan, wait! It could be dangerous!" Chris shouted, chasing Dan inside.


	4. Chapter 3

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter 3-

It was a chaotic scene as Chris re-entered the restaurant. Patrons and staff were almost trampling each other (and Chris) to get out of the restaurant, and the girls they had run into outside (or rather, who had run into them) were knocking on doors at random and shouting for the Démon sisters to show themselves. A quick scan of the restaurant told Chris that the red-haired boy was hiding in a booth, but he couldn't seem to find Dan anywhere. He slowly began sneaking through the restaurant, attempting to locate his friend. He was just next to the kitchen when the door suddenly burst open, swung around, and hit Chris in the face. Dan quickly scooted out wielding a frying pan and a soup ladel, and took a quick look around him. He saw Chris crumpled on the floor.

"Quit lying around and get up, Chris," Dan hissed, tossing the ladel onto his chest.

Chris straightened up and brushed himself off, and he gave Dan a worried look. "Dan, what are you doing?" He whispered. "There are guns and swords and people crazier than you in here, you could get yourself killed!"

"Sure, if I'm stupid," Dan said. "I'm just gonna smack these girls over the head with this pan and knock them out." He hefted the frying pan, to emphasise his plan. "That way, they can't get to those Demon Sisters, and I can get my revenge on them without interference."

"For the last time, it's Démon, Dan," Chris said. "And what about that kid?"

"If he gets in my way, I'll klonk him one too, simple as that!" Dan explained. "He doesn't look like much of an issue anyway, I bet you could even take him."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Chris said indignantly. He shook his head. "Nevermind, let's just forget about this whole thing and get out of here."

Meanwhile, the two girls were still searching for their quarry. By this time, the only ones in the restaurant were them, the red-head, Dan, and Chris. The goth-looking girl walked out of a washroom looking disappointed and irritated. "They're not in here, either, Panty," she said.

"For fuck's sake, where the hell are they?" Panty said, scratching her head with the butt of her handgun. "It's not like they could've run out with the crowd, they'd stick out like a sore thumb." She sighed. "Whatever, just keep looking, Stocking, we'll find 'em."

"I'll bet those two guys were just planted there by those bitches to throw us off," the other girl, Stocking, said. "They're probably clear across town, and we're just wasting time here."

"I'm not so sure," the red-headed boy said. "They might not even know that we're here in LA yet. For all they know, we could be back in Daten City."

"Eh, it doesn't seem like they're here, even if they know we're here or not." Panty said. She gave a sigh of disappointment. "Come on, let's get out of-"

"Well well well, what a suprise seeing you all here."

All five heads turned to the source of the voice. There, standing in the doorway of the second V.I.P. room, were Scanty and Kneesocks, each wielding a sinister looking pair of weapons, Scanty with a set of jet black handguns, and Kneesocks with a duo of wickedly curved sythes. Stocking immediately took her place at Panty's side, and the four raised their respective weapons to each other.

"So you finally decided to show your fuckin' faces," Panty sneered. "What stupid plan are you two doing that involves you being all the way out here?"

"That," Kneesocks said, pointing one of her sythes to the blonde, "is none of your concern. What are you all doing here?"

"We got a call from someone saying you were out here stirring up shit," Stocking replied. "We thought it'd be nice to come down and say hello."

Scanty laughed. "Well, you've said your hellos. Now I suggest you all get out of this city before we have to make you leave."

The two teams began approaching each other, each looking like they would strike at any moment. The tension was building, and Dan, Chris, and the boy could all feel the pressure building. Finally, Chris decided to act.

"Ladies, please can't we settle this like adults?" Chris said, standing up and revealing himself. Everyone quickly looked to him, and, against his better judgement, he walked over and put himself between the four girls. "I mean, you can't just come in and start shooting each other, right? Someone could get hurt!"

"That's the idea, dipshit!" Panty shouted. "Now get out of the way so we can deal with these bitches, you stupid fucking idiot!"

"Hey!" It was Dan's turn to reveal himself, and he made a beeline right for Panty. He stood right up to her, and pointed the frying pan at her face. "Nobody talks that way to Chris but me, understand? I ought to smack you right along the side of the head for saying that!"

Panty was unintimidated by his threats. "You'd better watch yourself, shorty!" She shouted. "You're just asking me to stick my foot right up your fuckin' ass!"

"Bring it, you blonde bimbo! If you fight half as well as you drive, then I'll have no trouble at all teaching you some respect!"

The two lunged at each other, but each was held back, Dan by Chris, and Panty by Stocking. Amid all the yelling, screaming, kicking, and general choas, the boy suddenly noticed something. "Everybody! Stop!" He shouted from his booth. They all froze, Dan clutching a handful of Panty's hair and Panty about to bite down on Dan's other hand. They looked, and Scanty and Kneesocks were missing, and the fire exit door was slowly closing. Everybody quickly rushed outside, and they saw a limosine peeling away and rounding a corner. They all stood quietly, before Panty spoke up.

"Nice fucking going, you idiot!" Panty shouted at Dan. "You let those bitches get away!"

"So what if I did?" Dan said. "At least I don't have to worry about you jerks getting in the way of my revenge for now!"

"Wait, revenge?" Stocking said. "You mean you've got an issue with them too?"

"I do, as a matter of fact," Dan said. "And I'd appreciate it if you all vamoosed so I can deal with them myself."

"You'd better tell us about it," the red-head said. "It might help us figure out what the Demon Sisters are up to."

"See, Chris?" Dan said. "I knew it was 'Demon' all along."

"Fine, Dan, you were right," Chris said. "But we should probably get out of here, the police are probably on their way, and Dan isn't exactly on good terms with the local authorities. I'm Chris, and this is Dan, by the way."

"I'm Brief, and this is Panty and Stocking," Brief said. "We'll take our car, yours doesn't exactly look drivable right now."

"And who's fault is that?" Dan said, glaring at Panty. "And besides, I'm not getting in that hell-wagon with her behind the wheel. I happen to like living, if it's all the same to you."

"What if I were to drive?" Chris said. "Provided that it's okay with you three."

"Well, you aren't exactly Motorist of the Year, either," Dan said. "But at least I'm familiar with your incompitence. It's decided, Chris is driving." Dan walked over and climbed into the back seat. "Well, are you all coming?" he said.

The other four looked at each other, and Chris sighed. "You might as well let me drive now, once Dan's made up his mind there's no changing it." They all climbed in, Chris taking the wheel while Panty sat shotgun. Stocking and Brief both squeezed into the back with Dan. "We'll head back to my place, we'll all talk there, and figure out what to do about the Démo- Demon sisters."With that, the five drove off, See-Through seeing tamer driving than it ever had before. Dan's car way left behind with a caved-in trunk and a bent rear axle. There'd be no avenging it this time, however, because Dan knew that he might need these people to help him take revenge on the Demon sisters.

At least, not yet, Dan thought, watching the red car dissapear from view as they all rounded the corner.


	5. Chapter 4

_Atuhors Nose (Author's Notes): I apologize to the people following this story (read: one person at the time of writing this note) about constantly getting notifications for re-uploaded chapters. I have a habit of not proofreading chapters before I upload them to the site, and thus, a few errors slip through unnoticed. It's only until after the chapter is published that I spot these errors, and I have to go back and correct the document, and re-publish the chapter. This results in people following the story getting multiple notifications for the same chapter. Once again, I apologize, and from now on I'll proofread the chapters before I upload them. If you happen to spot an error that I missed, I.E. a misnamed character, a logical falicy going against either the source material or something that's already established in-story (keep in mind that this story takes place before both Dan Vs. Technology and Episode 12 of Panty and Stocking, and your ships, pairings, and head-canon don't apply here), or a simple spelling/grammar mistake, feel free to inform me about it via review or email. I can be reached at . Thank you for your time, and enjoy this corrected version of Chapter 4._

_-EverSoNitro_

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter 4-

"...and you'd better not scratch it one bit! Just because it's slightly damaged doesn't mean I won't be able to tell!"

The group was back at Chris and Elise's house. Dan had decided to call a tow truck to pick up his car, as much as it pained him to have it sent to a lot, while the others discussed Dan's feud with the Demon Sisters. Chris was finishing his explanation about Dan's apartment when Dan hung up the phone.

"...and so, Dan's decided to get back at Scanty and Kneesocks, like he usually does in situations like this." Chris said.

"This is a common occurence for you two?" Brief inquired.

"Oh, you wouldn't believe the things I've been through!" Dan said, sitting down with the group. "I've had to exact vengeance on the beach, my super-villain dentist, baseball, Canada, heck, just a couple weeks ago George Washington made a palm tree fall on my car!"

"Yeah, I'm not even gonna begin to ask about that last one," Panty said with a very bored expression on her face. She pulled her pinky out of her ear after using it as a makeshift q-tip, then continued. "So, bottom line is, the bitches fucked with you and you want to get back at them."

"Pretty much," Dan said. "And I've had a pretty good track record with this, other than that incident with Elise's vertigo toxin when I was getting back at traffic." He muttered the last part under his breath. "So, thank you, but your services will no longer be required."

"Our services?" Stocking repeated. "We're not here on some fucking errand, we've been dealing with those two for fucking ages! If anyone should back off and let the others take care of it, it's you!"

"Alright, it's not going to do anybody any good to just sit and argue about this," came a voice from the hallway. Everybody turned to look, and Elise walked out into the living room. "Seeing as you three know more about them, and Dan's... well, the most stubborn person I've ever met, why don't you all just work together?"

"Yeah, Elise is right!" Chris said, standing up. "Besides, there's strength in numbers, and we out number those Demon Sisters almost three to one!"

Panty sighed. "I guess we could give it a shot. Just try to stay out of our way, shorty."

"Would you stop it with the shorty bit?" Dan said. "You're barely two inches taller than me!"

"I'll call you shorty if I want to!" Panty shouted. "It's your fault we lost the Demon bitches back at the restaurant!"

"You wrecked my car!" Dan shouted back. The two quickly began squabbling, and both Chris and Brief stepped in to break up the fight. Once it was all sorted out, they began discussing their nest course of action.

"Were not going to get much done just sitting around here watching Panty and Dan go at it every five minutes," Stocking said.

"Agreed," Brief said, nodding. "Maybe we should try to determine why Scanty and Kneesocks have decided to turn their interests to Dan's building."

"We should probably go take a look around Dan's apartment." Chris suggested. "Maybe they were actually looking for something when they did that inspection."

"I wouldn't reccomend taking your car," Elise said. "The Demon Sister's building is right next to Dan's. I'd imagine that they'd be spending more time in there, now that they know you three are here. You should probably all take our car."

"Maybe we should disguise you three as well," Dan said. "It wouldn't do us much good if those two spotted you near my place."

They all agreed, and they began thinking up some disguise that would let Panty, Stocking, and Brief get into Dan's apartment without arousing too much suspicion.

The next day, the five pulled up to Dan's building in Chris's vehicle. Chris and Dan climbed out first, looked around. There wasn't any indication that the Demon Sisters were around, barring their limosine being parked outside their building, so Dan motioned for the remaining three to climb out.

The three of them all got out of the car, each in a beige jumpsuit and wearing ridiculous oversized mustaches. On the backs of the jumpsuits was a logo bearing the name "Heavenly Cleaners".

"I feel so stupid," Stocking said. "This jumpsuit is so stiflingly hot!"

"Would you keep it down?" Dan said. "You and Panty were complaining about them the whole time down here, but Brief hasn't said a word!"

"That's because he wears jumpsuits all the time, he's used to it!" Panty said. "God knows why, I wouldn't be caught dead in this thing."

"It's official ghost-hunting attire!" Brief explained. "I have to have the right equipment if-"

"Shh!" Dan warned. "Someone's coming!"

The doors swung open on the Démon Arms building, and a crimson carpet rolled out and stopped just at the curb beside the limo. A short moment later, the Demon Sisters strolled down towards their vehicle, noses high in the air. Suddenly, Kneesocks stopped, as if sensing something was amiss. Her sister didn't notice at first, but then Scanty realized that Kneesocks wasn't next to her.

"Miss Kneesocks?" Scanty asked, looking puzzled. "Is something the matter?"

"Forgive me, but I've detected a rather foul odor in the air," she said.

"It always smells out here, Miss Kneesocks," Scanty said. "I thought you'd have realized that by- oh! Well isn't this unexpected!" She said suddenly, noticing the group. The two walked over to Dan and Chris. "Why hello there, gentlemen," she said. "Fancy meeting you two out here after the... fiasco last night."

"Oh, that?" Chris said, nervously. "It wasn't really a fiasco, I'd say. More of a situation, or a pickle, or-"

"What Chris means to say is," Dan said, ending Chris's rambling, "we're both sorry about what happened last night, and I'm deeply sorry about the awful things I said to you two fine ladies. I should have realized that you two are simply trying to run a business, and I hope that you two can forgive me."

"Oh, that's quite alright, Mr. Dan," Kneesocks said. "You two actually helped us out of a rather delicate situation last night with those two mad-women. I hope they didn't give you too much trouble."

"Them? They were pushovers!" Dan said waiving his hand. "They went running right after you two left, but not before I walloped 'em one!"

"Well, thank you for that, at any rate," Scanty said. "Our offer still stands on that money for your knew home, by the way. Are you sure you wouldn't like it?"

"No thanks, I'm fine," Dan said. "Though, I'm sure you noticed the damage done to my car by those crazy chicks when you left the restaurant. If it wouldn't be too much to ask, could I borrow some money to pay for repairs? I'm afraid the insurance company has stopped covering me after all that's happened to my car."

"Fair enough," Kneesocks said. She gave a sharp whistle through her fingers, and a small, red, insect-like creature scuttled out of the limosine holding a velvet pillow with a stack of bills on top. It brought it to the sister's side, and Scanty picked up the money. She took a small portion off of it, and held it out to Dan. "Will two thousand dollars do?" She asked.

"Yeah, that's plenty, thanks!" Dan said. He pocketed the money, and continued. "Anyway, we should probably get out of your hair, we were just about to go clean my apartment." He said, gesturing to the disguised angels and boy. Kneesocks gave them an evaluating look through her glasses. "You three are cleaners?" She asked them.

"Uh, yes ma'am, we're Heavenly Cleaning!" Brief said, with a falsified deep voice. "We'll make your home shine like the gates of heaven!"

"That's funny," Kneesocks continued. "I don't see a truck with you. How do you take your supplies with you?"

"Uh, they're a relatively new company," Chris said. "It belongs to my cousin... Paul." He put around Panty. "I'm just trying to help him get his feet off the ground."

"Uh, yeah, that's right!" Panty added with a somewhat unconvincing man-voice, slapping Chris roughly on the back. "I can always count on my good old cousin... Chris?"

Scanty and Kneesocks stared at the trio appraisingly. Finally, they seemed convinced. "Yes, well, I won't keep you any longer," Scanty said. She produced a business card and handed it to the disguised Panty. "Why don't you give us a call, and we might see about arranging a cleaning contract with you people." The two turned and walked back to their limo. The small red creature stayed behind for a moment, staring at them all intently, before a whistling came from the limo. It scuttled back to its masters, and shut the door before rounding the front of the vehicle and getting into the driver's seat. The limo pulled away, and the Demon Sisters shouted a farewell as they left.

"We bid you adieu!"

They all waved until the limo dissapeared from view, and Dan suddenly clutched his cranium.

"Agh! I've never had to be that nice before!" He shouted. "I think I gave myself an anyurism from suppressing my urge to punch them in the face!"

"Whatever, let's just go search the place and leave before they get back," Chris said. They all nodded, and the group headed up to the apartment.


	6. Chapter 5

_Atuhor's Nose: Hello once again, dear readers. I'm sure you're all enjoying my story thus far, but unfortunately, I'm somewhat unsure of how to move the story forward from this chapter. Some of you may diagnose this as Writer's Block, but I don't believe that this is the case, and that it's simply a lack of creativity on my part. So, I'm turning to you all to help me formulate how to get from point A (This chapter) to point B (The final confrontation with the Demon Sisters, and Dan finally taking his revenge). I already have a vague idea of how the situation is going to play out in point B, and there's one plot point to be covered next chapter, I just need a leg up getting all the pieces in place. Don't be shy, send your ideas to , and I will steal them with extreme prejudice I mean give proper credit to the ideas that I implement. Please refrain from contributing your ideas via review, however. I want to avoid any possible spoilers that may result from that, and as such, any ideas submitted through a review will be ignored. Thank you for your time, and enjoy Chapter 5 of Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters._

_-EverSoNitro_

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter 5-

The five all reached the door of Dan's apartment. Before they entered, however, Chris turned to Panty, Stocking, and Brief.

"I'll give you all fair warning now," Chris said. "Dan's place isn't exactly the cleanest place in the world."

"You think we care about some messy bachelor pad?" Stocking said, removing her false mustache. "We've faced living piles of vomit and shit before, a few pairs of underwear lying around isn't gonna faze us."

"Whatever," Dan said, unlocking his door. "Let's get a move on. The sooner we figure out what's really going on here, the sooner I can get my hands on those Demon Sisters." He pushed the door open, and they all walked inside. They barely made it a foot inside when Panty, Stocking, and Brief suddenly looked like they were going to throw up.

"God, what the fuck is with that stench?" Panty choked. "You could probably bottle the air in here and sell it as a fucking weapon!"

"No chance of that," Stocking gagged. "They'd probably list using it as a fucking war crime!"

Chris scratched the back of his head, looking embarrased. "Well, you get used to it after a while," he said. Dan, meanwhile, crossed his arms over his chest, looking insulted, and muttered something like "It isn't THAT bad."

"Let's just get this over with," Panty said. "I feel like I'm going to pass out."

And so, they began looking through the apartment. Brief had pulled out a small device, and had been taking readings all about the apartment. Suddenly, the device began to beep and flash erratically, just as he was near a pile of shoes pouring out of the closet. "Jeez!" Brief shouted. "The spectral energy levels here are through the roof!"

"So what, I've got some ghoul lounging around here, mooching off of me?" Dan said. He picked up a nearby broom and began swatting the air around him, nearly hitting Chris in the back of the head. "Get out of here, you lecherous hellbeast! I'm not gonna let you stay here until you cough up some rent!"

"No, I don't think it's anything like that," Brief said. He examined the shoes for a minute. "Here, let's see if there's something behind these."

Dan, Brief, and Stocking all bent down and began tossing the shoes into the middle of the room. As Chris watched the pile slowly turn into a mountain of Reeboks, he asked his friend, "Man, what's with all the shoes, Dan?"

"Is it a crime to make sure you have an appropriate pair of shoes for any given situation?" Dan said, still picking through.

"I don't think there're enough possible situations in the world to warrant this many pairs of shoes," Brief noted.

"Who asked you?" Dan said. Finally, they removed enough pairs of shoes to get a good look at the wall and closet behind them. At a glance, it looked fairly unremarkable, but a closer look into the closet revealed that there was a square lightly scratched into the paint, roughly four feet wide and high, and some sort of symbol was scratched within the square.

"What in the world is that?" Chris asked, peering at the markings.

"I don't really know," Dan said. "It was there when I moved in, I just figured whatever jerk lived in here scratched it into the wall because it was some sort of gang symbol and he wanted to be hip and cool."

"Evidently, that's not the case," Brief said. As he held the device closer to the square, it beeped and flashed even more wildly than it had before. He took out a pad of paper and sketched out the symbol. Panty, meanwhile, had crouched down beside it and knocked within the square. A dull, echoing thud could be heard.

"Hey, it's hollow!" Panty said. She stood up, and gave the section of wall a swift kick. She ended up putting her foot right through the drywall.

"P-p-p-panty!" Brief stammered in shock. "What are you doing?"

"Seeing what's behind here, duh," she said. She began tearing out pieces of drywall, until there was a hole large enough to look through. Dan was not taking the wanton destruction of his wall lightly though, and had to be held back by both Chris and Stocking, to keep him from lunging at Panty.

"Let me go!" Dan shouted. "She's destroying my wall! She must pay!"

"Sacrifices must be made, Dan!" Chris said. "Otherwise, we're not going to figure out what the Demon Sisters are up to!"

As the two of them wrestled with the angry Dan, Panty looked into the hole. She was greeted with a shaft that went down too far for the light to reach the bottom. Pulling a penny out of her pocket, she dropped it down in, and listened. After about twenty seconds, a dull clink met her ear. "Shit, that's a long way down."

"About one and a half miles, by my calculation," Brief said, who had pulled out a timer when Panty dropped the coin. "I'm almost certain that there's something down there, and whatever it is, I think it's safe to say that Scanty and Kneesocks are after it." The two of them stood up, and turned to Chris and Stocking, who had to tie Dan's arms and legs up to keep him restrained.

"You're, uh, pretty good with knots, Stocking," Chris observed, as Dan snarled and writhed around on the floor.

Stocking blushed, looking somewhat embarrased. "Well, let's just say that knot tying is... a hobby of mine."

Chris raised an eyebrow, but chose not to pursue the subject. "So, Panty, Brief, what did you find out?" Chris said, over Dan's shouts of "Untie me! I'm completely calm!"

"Geek Boy says there's something under the building, and that the idiots are trying to get their hands on it." Panty said.

"I'm not sure what, though," Brief said. "I'll have to check with Garter and see what he knows about this symbol," He held up his sketch to show Chris.

"Okay," Chris said. "We've probably figured out all we can here, let's head back to our place." Stocking bent down and released Dan from his bindings, and he rose, giving a nasty look at both the Anarchy Sisters.

"You're paying for that wall," Dan said, pointing at Panty. He then stormed out of the apartment, and the other four followed him, leaving the apartment empty as they ventured forth to Chris's house.

-Later that night-

Dan's apartment was deserted. A click from the door signified the door being unlocked, and it slowly swung into the apartment.

"Just as I suspected," a voice said. "Those weren't cleaners at all."

The Demon Sisters walked into the apartment, both with unhappy looks on their faces. "I can't believe we just let him waltz in here with those disgusting angels," Kneesocks continued. "We should have just killed them right there and then!"

"Now now, dear sister, you're blushing again," Scanty said. "You know we couldn't execute them in the open like that. We still have to keep up appearances in front of the general public; a quintuple homocide wouldn't do well for our image, now would it?"

"I suppose you're right," Kneesocks replied. She began walking through the apartment. She stopped as she saw the hole in the closet that Panty had left behind. "Well, dear sister, it would appear as though they're on the verge of discovering our plan," she said, an annoyed look spreading on her face.

"Well, then that just means we'll have to put things into motion sooner rather than later," Scanty said. "We can't have those angels interfering can we?"

"What about that Dan character?" Kneesocks said. "He seems to be intent on being a rather large nuisance for us."

"A large one, yes, but a nuisance all the same," Scanty replied. "He's but a mortal, he poses no real threat to us."

"Well said," Kneesocks said. "I'll call the demoltion crew in the morning, and inform them of our decision to have them come in sooner."

"I'll inform the tenants," Scanty said. "It would be suspicious if the building was torn down early without notice." The two of them headed for the door. "Just think, Miss Kneesocks," she continued, a wicked grin spreading across her face. "Just a short while longer, and the entire world will be at our feet!"

"You say that like they're good enough to be given the chance to beg for mercy," Kneesocks replied, a similar evil smile emerging on her own face. "No, I think they'd be more at home under our feet, squashed like the insects they are."

The two of them laughed as they exited the apartment, and the door was shut behind them.


	7. Chapter 6

_Atuhor's Nose: You all can go ahead and ignore the previous chapter's note, I guess it was just a temporary bout of Writer's Block. Basically, I forgot why I rarely write two chapters in the same day. It's because I get worn out writing the chapter of the day, and forget what I'm going to write for the next chapter. _

_Also, some of you may notice that the chapter length is dipping slightly from Chapter Two. I'm kind of getting trapped in exposition chapter after exposition chapter here, but rest assured that this will be ending fairly shortly. I haven't figured out precicly what I'm going to write in the next chapter, but I'm fairly confident that this is going to be the last piece of exposition that I'm doing before the story picks up again._

_But I digress. Here is Chapter Six of Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters. Enjoy._

_-EverSoNitro_

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter Six-

The team had arrived back at Chris's house, after dropping Dan off to pick up his car. They had decided to wait for him to get back before they attempted to make any futher sense of their discoveries back at Dan's apartment, namely the symbol in the closet and the cavity under the building. Finally, after a few hours of waiting, Dan walked through the door. Looking around the living room, he saw Panty, Chris, and Brief all playing a videogame, while Stocking sat and watched, snacking on a piece of cake she had found in the fridge.

"Hey!" Dan shouted, causing everyone to jump in surprise. "What are you slackers doing? We've got serious business to take care of here!"

"Oh, hey Dan," Chris said sheepishly. He shut off the TV (despite Panty's whines of "But I was winning!"), and continued. "So, you're car's all fixed?"

"Yeah, and it costed me more than those Demon Sisters gave me," he replied. He fished a credit card out of his pocket and tossed it to Chris. "Oh, by the way, you'll be getting an unrelated $2500 charge on your credit card bill this month, probably something Elise went and bought."

Chris took the card and eyed Dan suspiciously. He was fairly certain he knew who and what the charge was actually for, but he decided to keep his mouth shut. "That's probably good, then. We won't all have to cram into my car now."

"And we won't have to deal with your awful driving anymore," Dan added, to which a murmur of agreement spread throughout the room. "But I digress," Dan continued. "Why haven't you been working on finding out what's under my building while I was gone?"

"Well," Brief said. "We decided we should wait for you to get back, because-"

"Because we figured you probably would have blown up in our faces if you found out we found anything out with you gone," Panty interrupted.

"...You're probably right about that, actually," Dan said. He walked over and plopped down on the couch next to Stocking, who was still eating the cake. "So le-" He stopped as he noticed something unusual on the icing of the cake. He saw a half of a balloon, and an H and what could be a piece of an A. He looked at Stocking. "Where did you get that?" He asked her.

"I got it out of the fridge," Stocking said. "What does it matter? It's not very good any-"

"Chris, why is there a birthday cake in your fridge?" Dan asked Chris, interrupting Stocking. "I thought I took your birthday cake the other day."

"Yeah, well," Chris said, rubbing the back of his head. "Elise kind of figured we should make two cakes for my birthday, in case you showed up and..."

"And?" Dan said, as Chris started to trailed off.

"And somehow ruined the first one." Chris said hurriedly.

"What?" Dan said incredulously. "I'd never do something like that! How dare she imply I would do such a thing!"

"To be fair, you did steal the first one," Chris said.

"I didn't steal it, I merely accepted it as payment," Dan explained. "Besides, it's still intact, though substantially more eaten. Where's Elise so I can tell her how insulted I am?"

"She said she had to go on a business trip in Detroit for a few days," Chris said.

"I'm not sure I really believed her, to be honest." Brief said. "I happened to glance into your bedroom while she was packing a little while ago, and she was packing what looked like pretty high-end night-vision goggles into her bag."

"Whatever, maybe she likes to read in the dark," Dan said. "It's none of our concern. I'll just have to berate her when she gets ba-"

"Blah blah blah who cares?" Panty cut in, looking extremely bored. "As interesting as your relationship drama is, shouldn't we be doing something?"

"Oh! Right!" Brief said, fumbling around in his pocket and pulling out his phone. He dialed a number on his phone, and waited for somebody to answer. "Hello, Garter? It's Brief. We've discovered this symbol that may be connected with whatever the Demon Sisters are planning," he explained. "Hold on, I'll send you a picture." He pointed the camera of his phone at the symbol he had drawn in his notepad, and took a picture. As the picture was sent to the person at the other end, he continued. "We were wondering if you knew what-"

Suddenly, a loud voice erupted from the speaker of Brief's phone, causing him to quickly stretch the hand holding the phone away from his ear. "YOU MUST STOP THE DEMON SISTERS AT ALL COSTS!" The voice, presumably the one known as Garter, screamed. "IF THEY SUCCEED IN FREEING WHAT LIES UNDERNEATH THE CITY, THEY COULD DESTROY THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT!"

There was a short pause, and Garter continued, albiet in a substaintially calmer voice. "There is an old legend that tells of a being of great power that rampaged throughout the area now known as California. This being was fueled by a great anger at the mortals of the Earth, and was unhappy with the way they feuded with one another over things it deemed trivial. It sought to bring peace to the Earth, by way of destroying mankind and ending their wars. It stormed across the land, killing mortals everywhere it went. Legend has it one man, after traveling afar to exact vengeance on a savage warlord for killing his family, returned to find his home and possesions destroyed by the beast. He swore revenge on the monster, and followed its wake of destruction until he caught up with it. He fought and fought and eventually incapacitated it, but he was unable to destroy it for good.

"As it turned out, the beast was a Ghost, feuled by the hatred of mankind for one another, so the man, being a mortal, was unable to vanquish it on his own. Instead, he chose to seal it beneath the earth, and enlisted the aid of a shaman to put the Ghost into an eternal slumber. However, the only way the spell would remain permanent is if the man, and any member of his bloodline following him, remained overtop of its resting place for all eternity.

"It was fortold that the bloodline would become diluted, however, and the spell would be weakened as a result. At this time, a pair of slaves of what they called the Dark Master of the Realm of the Wicked, would attempt to break the weakened spell by forcing the man away from the spot where the beast lies, and unleash the Ghost upon the Earth yet again, this time the beast having absorbed thousands and thousands of years of mankind's anger and hatred. However, the decendant guarding the beast would be aided by two servants of the Righteous Lord of the Realm of the Pure, who would assist the decendant in fighting off the dark slaves, and keep the spell intact by ensuring the decendant keep his place."

"Hang on..." Chris said. "Dark Master of the Realm of the Wicked, and Righteous Lord of the Realm of the Pure... that sounds an awful lot like the Devil and God, and Hell and Heaven! Which would mean that the dark slaves would be two demons, and the pure servants would be two angels!"

"Scanty and Kneesocks..." Brief continued. "And Panty and Stocking... but that would make Dan..."

The whole room turned to look at Dan. He looked back at the group, an eyebrow raised. "Why is everybody looking at me like that?" He asked.

"Dan," Chris said slowly. "Think about it. The guy that fought with the Ghost had just gotten back to his home from exacting revenge on someone when he swore vengeance on the monster for destroying his home. Doesn't that sound familiar to you?"

"And after he sealed the Ghost underground, his decendants have lived in the same place ever since," Stocking said. "Now, thousands of years later, the Demon Sisters are trying to force you out of your home, and Panty and I, a couple of angels, are helping you to get back at them and keep your apartment."

Dan stared at the group silently. "...So?"

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Panty sighed. She leapt over the table and grabbed Dan by the shirt. She started shaking him as hard as she could. "You're the fucker's decendant!" She shouted. "This whole fuckin' situation is a prophecy from a thousand fucking years ago! If we don't stop those bitches from destorying your apartment, they'll free the fuckin' ghost and KILL. EVERYONE."

Dan swatted Panty's arms away and straightened up. "So... the whole world depends on me getting my apartment back?"

"It would appear that would be the case," Garter said from over the phone.

"And if I don't, the Demon Sisters are going to free some horrorterror that's lurking just under my home and destroy everything on the planet?"

"Sure looks that way," Chris said.

Dan said nothing for a good minute. Finally, a pair of words escaped his mouth.

"Holy shit."


	8. Chapter 7

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter Seven-

Dan had left Chris's house in a hurry. Learning that he was part of some prophetic tale was a bit much for him to process. He was driving around to clear his head, but all that entered his mind was further questions. Had his whole life followed some script laid out thousands of years ago? Was his feud with Scanty and Kneesocks the final act in the play of his exsistance? What would happen afterward? Would there even be an afterward for him? These and many other questions went unanswered as he passed by his apartment. He parked his car in its appropriate place, and looked up at the building. It was hard for him to imagine that it was his destiny to live here, to unknowingly protect the world from a savage monster lurking just below. He recalled that there had been a couple of people that were in the process of moving out as he moved in. One of them could have been some distant relative, simply passing the responsibility of guarding the Ghost underground onto him without ever realizing it.

His train of thought was interrupted as he noticed a figure moving around near the doors of the apartments through the dark of the night. Ducking down behind his steering wheel, he watched the figure put something on the door of each apartment, including his own, and then walk down the steps away from the building. After a minute, he exited the vehicle and ran up to his door. A note had been posted about halfway down, sitting just at eye level with Dan. He snatched it off, and read it carefully in what little light the moon provided through the overcast sky.

Dear Tenant,

Due to a scheduling conflict, the demolition of this building will take place one week earlier than originally scheduled. We apologize for any inconvinience this may cause.

Sincerely,

The Démon Sisters

Dan's eyes widened as he read the note. "One week?" He did a bit of math in his head. "But that would make it the day after tomorrow!" He quickly pulled out his phone and dialed Chris's number. "Chris, we've got a major problem on our ha-"

Suddenly, he was roughly pushed forward, causing him to smash into his door and drop his phone. He whipped around to locate his assailant, and he saw two flashes of shiny black, followed by the sound of two blades embedding themselves into wood. Looking down, he saw a pair of wicked looking scythes around his midsection, restraining him against the door. He saw his phone lying on the ground a few feet away, but before he could get to it, a red hand picked it up, and brought it up to a familiar face.

"My apologies," the owner of the hand said into the phone. "But Dan is currently unable to come to the phone right now. Please leave a message after the beep." At this, she tossed the phone up into the air, and pulled out a black handgun. As the phone reached the apex of its flight, she fired the gun, and shot a hole clean through the center. The destoryed device hitthe ground, and broke in two. Dan looked up, and saw the Demon Sisters, Scanty and Kneesocks, standing before him. "Good evening, Mr. Dan," Scanty said. "How can we help you this fine evening?"

"Let me go you vile hellions!" Dan shouted, arms swinging wildly in an attempt to connect with one of the sisters. "I know what you two are planning, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let you get away with it!"

"Now now, Dan, we musn't let our temper get the better of us," Kneesocks said, waving a disapproving finger. "Those blades holding you to the door are rather sharp, and I would feel awful if you were to hurt yourself on them."

"I see you've had your car repaired," Scanty noted, seeing the vehicle parked near the building. "So glad Miss Kneesocks and I could help you foot the bill."

"Oh, drop the pleasantries already," Dan said. "It's pretty obvious that we hate each other, there's no reason to pretend otherwise."

"Very well," Scanty said. She aimed her pistol over to Dan's car, and shot out three of the tires, as well as the headlights. As the air hissed out of the tires and glass tinkled against the ground, she continued. "Now, I suppose you're well aware of what's underneath our feet at this very moment."

"Yeah, some giant monster feuled by rage," Dan said. "I still don't believe how stupid you two must be to want to free something like that."

"You'd better watch what you say around your superiors, Dan," Kneesocks said. "Might I remind you that you're in no place to be tossing insults at us. Now, as for why we want to free the beast. It's quite simple really. Miss Scanty and I will be able to use the Ghost to hold the world ransom, and demand that we be crowned the rightful rulers of this sorry planet. If not, we free the beast and let it destroy humanity."

"Seriously?" Dan snorted. "That's your big plan? Man, how cliché can you get? I suppose you'll be contacting the UN from your secret volcano lair located on a remote island, huh?"

"I will admit that the plan does seem somewhat 'saturday morning cartoon villain'-esque," Scanty said, crossing her arms. "But then again, we could always just go with Plan B."

"And what would that be?" Dan said.

"Let the Ghost destroy humanity and enjoy the all of the chaos." Scanty said. "Again, simple, but it seems like much more fun, wouldn't you agree?"

"Can't honestly say that I do," Dan said. "So I suppose you two are just going to kill me now, huh?"

"Kill you?" Scanty laughed. "Where would you get a ludicrous idea like that?"

"Well, I'm sure you know by now that I'm in cahoots with Panty and Stocking," Dan explained. "And from what they've told me, they kick you two to the curb on a fairly regular basis."

"He does raise a good point, dear sister," Kneesocks said. "And besides," she continued, gripping the handle of one of the scythes. "It would be so easy for me to slice him in two right this instant."

"Now now, dear sister, we're civilized people, we don't just go around killing people when it's convinient," Scanty said. "Besides, all that blood would be a hard thing to explain to the demolition crew when they discovered it. No, I think we would be better to simply let him go." She turned to Dan. "You can run along and make whatever foolish plans you want to with those half-wit angels, as well as that oaf you call Chris. You still won't be able to stop the two of us. You're merely a mortal, what chance do you have against a pair of High Class Commander Demons?" With that, Kneesocks roughly removed the scythes from around him, intentionally grazing his side with one of them. Dan staggered forward and dropped to his knees, clutching the sizable gash in his side and feeling blood trickling from under his hand.

The Demon Sisters laughed at his anguish. "Would you look at that, dear sister!" Scanty said. "He already knows his place!"

"I know my place... alright..." Dan growled through his teeth.

"What was that?" Kneesocks said mockingly. "I didn't quite here you."

"I said I know my place alright!" Dan shouted, shakily rising to his feet. "My place is right here, in this apartment, and if you think you two can change that, then you've got another thing coming!"

For a moment, Scanty and Kneesocks looked somewhat intimidated by Dan's boldness. But Dan couldn't stay standing, and he fell back to his knees once again. The Demon Sisters merely laughed once again. Scanty patted Dan on the head, and Dan could only seeth as she humiliated him. "Now now, you just focus on getting better. You're in no shape to be fighting anyone, little boy."

Dan stayed down clutching his side as the two sisters walked away, laughing. Dan stayed silent for a minute, feeling his jeans absorb some of the blood as it started to pool underneath him. He finally decided to try to reach Chris again, this time through the walkie talkie he had given Chris on his birthday. He pulled up the collar of his shirt, where a tiny device was clipped onto his collar. "Chris? Come in Chris, are you there?" Dan said.

After a moment of static, Dan heard Chris's voice. "Dan, is that you? What happened?"

"Demon Sisters jumped me," Dan explained. "Left me with a pretty nasty cut."

"We figured as much, Panty took off as soon as she heard Scanty's voice on the phone." Chris said.

"She's too late if she wants to fight them, they left," Dan said. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a pink hummer screech to a halt outside of the apartment. "But I could use some medical attention."

"Alright, just hang on, I'm sure Panty'll be over there to pick you up shortly."

"Don't worry, I'm already here," Panty said, kneeling down beside Dan and taking the walkie talkie. "I'll take care of Shorty."

"Okay, good." There was a slight pause, and some murmuring could be heard. "Brief says to be careful, those two could be lurking anywhere."

"Tell him I'll be just fine," Panty said. "They're not gonna be able to lay a finger on me as long as I have good ol' Backlace."

"Could we hurry this along, please?" Dan said. "I'm starting to get light headed."

"Shit, alright, talk to you guys later," Panty said, letting go of the device. She looked at the cut on Dan's side. "Shit, they really fucked you up, huh?"

"Keen observation doctor," Dan said. "Now, are you just gonna stand there and let me bleed out or are you gonna do something?"

"Alright, fuck, keep your pants on," Panty said. She hurried back to See Through and began rummaging around within it. After a moment of searching, she found what she was looking for, and hurried back to Dan. She was holding a small vial of clear liquid. "Lift up your shirt, let's see that cut again."

Dan lifted his shirt as instructed, and Panty uncorked the vial. She poured its contents over the wound. For a moment, nothing happened, aside from some of the blood being washed away.

"Nothing's happening," Dan said. "Stop wasting time, would you?"

"Hold on a second, damnit, let it do its thing!" Panty said. Dan sighed and looked back to the cut. As he watched, the wound seemed to be healing before his eyes, as if time was being reversed. He watched as the skin reseal itself as if it was a zipper. There was a slightly pink line where the cut used to be, but it eventually faded.

"Whoa, what sort of wonderdrug was that, and where can I get some?" Dan said, as Panty helped him to his feet.

"It's just holy water," Panty explained. "That cut was made by an unholy weapon, so the holy water pretty much negated it."

"Holy water?" Dan said incredulously. "I just figured that priests just filled those dishes at the church with tap water and called it a day. I didn't know it was actually a thing."

"Well, this is ACTUAL holy water," Panty said. "Direct from heaven itself. Afro-priest made us carry it around ever since that Geek Boy started tagging along with us."

"Huh," Dan remarked. He then looked at his torn shirt and his bloodstained pants. "Hey, before we head back to Chris's, can I change? I don't really feel like wearing clothes that are all bloody and torn, it brings back bad memories."

"Sure, whatever," Panty agreed. "I'll just go wait in See Through, I don't really feel like going into your apartment ever again."

"Suit yourself," Dan said, as he walked into the apartment.

Later, Panty and Dan were headed back to Chris's. Dan had just finished explaining what he had called them about in the first place.

"Fuck, seriously?" Panty said. "Fuckin' shit, leave it to those two to make a bad situation worse!"

"My sentiments exactly," Dan said. "If we don't act soon, we're gonna be in serious trouble."

"Whatever, we'll figure out what to do once we're back at the house," Panty said. "Stockers and I have kicked those bitches in the ass before, we'll do it again." Dan opened his mouth to speak, but Panty guessed what he was going to say. "And you'll be there to get your own kick in too! Fuck, just settle down, alright?" There was a moment of silence between the two, so Panty decided to turn on See Through's stereo. She pressed the power button, and a CD already inside began playing.

_My name is Panty the crazy, sexy blondie, and I'm not dumb._

"Isn't it a little egotistical to listen to your own music?" Dan snorted.

"Oh, shut up," Panty said, just as a cencoring beep could be heard from the speakers. "It's a whole lot fuckin' better than listening to the radio. All I ever hear these days is some bitch singing about Friday and some kid with a higher fuckin' voice than me singing about fuckin' babies."

"Oh, don't get me started on that little Canadian twerp," Dan said. "I'm glad I wrecked that country, now the world will be spared from those puckslappers and their inherently awful music." Dan paused for a moment, listening to the music.

_Anarchy! Everyone wants to be me! Anarchy, yeah! Get it up so I can see!_

"So that bit in your video with the talk show host," Dan said. "That was obviously staged, right?"

"That's what we tell anyone that asks that question, to avoid lawsuits," Panty said. "But actually, no, I really fucked that guy."

"Seriously?" Dan said. "They didn't actually air that on the show, right?"

"Nah, Garter siezed all the tapes with that footage on it," Panty explained, smirking. "But I slipped that little bit in during post production, for laughs." She chuckled at the memory. "Fuck, you should've seen the fuckin' afro-priest's face when he saw that during the premier!"

Panty laughed and laughed, but Dan look somewhat disgusted. "Seriously? It was bad enough when I thought it wasn't real, but you actually put footage of yourself having intercourse in a music video that was broadcast pretty much globally! That's just indecent!"

Panty glared at Dan. "Shit, you sound just like Garterbelt," Panty said. "I never would've imagined you'd be a fuckin' prude. Chris maybe, but-"

"I'm no prude!" Dan said, crossing his arms over his chest. "I just hate the way the media portrays sex, is all. It should be something that should be kept intimate and private!"

"So that's how you feel, huh?" Panty said. She looked around and pulled off onto a side road. She came to a stop in a heavily wooded area, turned to Dan. "Well, this looks like a pretty private place, don't you think?"

Dan looked at Panty, not quite understanding what she was implying. The music continued playing in the background.

_I know you know... Those wings inside of you..._

"What exactly are you getting at?" Dan asked.

_I know you know... They do get naughty too..._

"Oh come on, Dan, use your fuckin' head," Panty said. "Just you and me, alone in a car in the middle of the woods, nobody around for miles..."

_Before I go... There's something I wanna say..._

Dan added things up in his mind. "Oh," was all that he could say before Panty threw her arms around him and kissed him heavily on the lips.

_Your sleepy Anarchy... wake it up, wake it up!_

_Atuhor's Footnose: Oh come on, you didn't expect me to put Panty in the story without having her do anyone, did you?_

_-Ever So Nitro_


	9. Chapter 8

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter Eight-

It had been a couple of hours since Panty had left, and Chris and Brief were both sitting at the kitchen table, both lost in feelings of worry and anxiousness for their friends. Stocking had been pacing around the kitchen, also feeling somewhat concerned with her sister's tardiness, though not to the same degree as the two at the table. They had tried contacting them roughly twenty minutes ago, but Panty wasn't answering her phone, and Dan wasn't repsonding over the walkie talkie, which only added to the thought that something happened to them.

Suddenly, the three of them heard the sound of the front door opening, and they all rushed into the front room. Panty strolled into the house, followed by Dan, who walked with a bit of a dizzy tiredness. Panty looked at the group as Dan flopped onto the couch. "What?" She said. "Nobody's going to say 'hey'?"

Brief and Stocking both looked like they had figured out what had kept the two of them, but Chris seemed to still be completely oblivious. "What happened?" he asked. "What kept the two of you for so long?"

"We, uh, got a little sidetracked on the way back," Dan said from the couch. "It's not important though. What is important is what I called you about before I was so rudely interrupted by the Demon Sisters. Show 'em the note, Panty."

Panty handed the note to Chris, and he began reading it, Stocking and Brief peeking over either shoulder. Panty continued talking as they read. "It looks like those bitches figured out that we're hot on their trail, so they're stepping up the pace and getting the place torn down in just a couple of days."

"Which means," Dan continued. "That we need to act tomorrow, or they'll be able to pull this whole scheme of theirs off without any interference whatsoever."

"Please tell me this is a joke," Chris said. "We're not even close to ready to going up against them!"

"Speak for yourself," Stocking said. "I've been itching to get at those sluts ever since we heard they were all the way out here!"

"That's a great attitude you've got there," Dan said. "Just hold onto that thought until tomorrow. Panty and I have been talking over how we're going to pull this off, and we think we've got a plan that's foolproof."

"That's right!" Panty said, driving her fist into her open palm. "Those bitches won't know what hit them!"

"Well, it's good that you two have taken the initiative," Brief said, looking at the clock. "But we'll have to discuss it tomorrow morning. I think it's time that we all went to bed. We'll have to be well rested if we're doing this tomorrow."

"Brief's right," Chris said, stretching and yawning. "It's almost midnight, and we'll have to get up bright and early if we want to pull this off." Chris turned around and headed for his bedroom. "Good night, everybody," he said, giving a wave. Brief followed suit, headed for the guest bedroom, while Dan stretched out on the couch, and rolled over to face the back. As Panty went to follow Brief, however, she was pulled aside into the kitchen by Stocking.

"Panty, you really didn't do what I think you did," Stocking whispered, "did you?"

"Stop being such a nosy bitch," Panty hissed. "What happened happened, I'll tell you about it some other time. Right now I want to get some sleep." She turned and walked into the guest room. Stepping around the cot that had been set up for Brief, she knocked on the door to the bathroom. "You in there, Geek Boy?"

"Just a minute, I'm changing," Brief said.

"Stay in there, I don't want you walking out on me while I'm changing," Panty said. Stocking walked into the room shortly afterward. Panty was in the process of changing into her pyjamas (consisting of nothing but a t-shirt and panties), while Stocking fished her black nightgown out of her bag.

"That's so typical of you, Panty," Stocking said. "You're left alone with a guy for one fucking second and you're all over him."

"Would you shut it?" Panty said, discarding her dress on Brief's cot. "At least I'm not the one who started gorging herself on cake the second it came into view."

"That's a different situation entirely," Stocking said, climbing into the bed. "Besides, it wasn't even that good."

"Whatever, let's just drop it," Panty said, climbing in beside Stocking. "Move over, you're hogging all the fuckin' sheets."

As the two drifted off to sleep, a voice came from behind the bathroom door. "P-p-panty?" Brief said. "Can I come out now?"

-The Next Day

The five of them pulled up in front of the two apartment buildings at around noon in Chris's car. Yellow caution tape had been put up around Casa Paridisio, and a few people in construction gear were milling around it, taking various measurements and marking spots around the building. Dan's car still sat outside of the building, three of the tires deflated. They noticed that Scanty herself was having a heated conversation with someone who they assumed to be the foreman.

"What are they saying?" Dan said. "It could be important, and we're missing it!"

"Hold on for a second," Chris said. He reached over and opened the glove compartment, where a number of gadgets lay within. He rummaged around, and pulled out what apeared to be a microphone with a dish around it. "We should be able to hear them with this."

"What's with all the gear?" Stocking said, peeking over Dan's seat.

"Elise keeps it in there in case of emergencies," Chris explained. "I've never really understood why, there's a accident kit in the trunk with a first aid kit and other stuff in the back, and I can't see any real use for most of this other-"

"Will you shut up?" Dan said. "We're wasting time!"

"Oh, right!" Chris said. He rolled down the window and aimed it at the two arguing across the street. They could hear the two of them over the speaker on the device.

"-know who you're talking to? I could buy your company and have every single one of you fired if it struck my fancy!"

"Look lady, I'll explain it to you again. We can't bring the place down until that apartment is empty. It unsafe to the workers, somebody could be seriously injured if that fridge fell on the, for instance. Now, we can reschedule so you can have somebody come in and clean the place out-"

"We've already rescheduled once, you neanderthal! It has to be done tomorrow, end of story!"

"The job ain't gonna get done any faster if you keep shouting at me, ma'am. If you don't want to be reasonable, you'll just have to find someone else to do it for you."

A sigh was heard over the microphone. "Alright, I have a proposal. What if I paid you double your rate to simply look the other way and tear down the building with everything still inside."

It was silent for a moment, the foreman seemed to be considering the deal. "Alright, you've got yourself a deal. I'll need it in cash though, and if anything happens to my workers, though, we'll be seeing you in court."

"That won't be a problem. It's been a pleasure doing business with you." The two shook hands, and Scanty turned and headed back to the Démon Arms. They all ducked down to avoid being spotted by her.

"Okay, so it's definitely going to happen tomorrow," Chris said.

"Let's get a move on," Dan said. "I'm sure that those guys are going to go in there and start stealing my stuff at some point."

"Alright, so everybody remembers what they're doing?" Panty said. Everybody nodded, and Chris and Brief stepped out of the car. They ran around to the back and pulled out two bags embolized with a logo from the costume store. They ducked into a nearby alley, and after a few minutes, they walked back out. They two of them were both dressed up as construction workers, and both wore false facial hair, Chris with a short beard, and Brief with a small mustache. They walked across the street, and they took their positions. Chris walked up to the foreman Scanty had been talking with earlier, while Brief simply made himself look inconspicuous.

"Are you sure this'll work?" Panty whispered to Dan as they watched.

"Trust me, Chris knows what he's doing," Dan said. They all watched intently through the car windows.

Chris walked up to the foreman and tapped him on the shoulder. "Hey, boss, what was all that about?" He inquired.

The foreman gave a jump. "Don't sneak up on me like that!" He shouted. "You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

"Sorry about that," Chris said.

The foreman sighed. "Nah, it's my fault. Shouldn't have snapped on you like that, it's just that those Démons've been on my case all day. Some idiot left his apartment full o' junk, and they want us to tear the place down anyway." He shook his head. "Ah well, we'll probably just have someone clear it out and dump it all in a dumpster somewhere."

"No kidding," Chris said. He looked at his watch. "Hey, you know it's almost lunch? Why don't we all take a break. You seem like you could use it."

"Yeah, maybe you're right" The foreman agreed. He picked up a megaphone. "Hey, time for lunch guys!"

"Hey, I've got an idea," Chris said. "Why don't we all go out and grab a bite to eat down at the burger place? It'd probably help get your mind off the Démons. I'm buying!"

The foreman thought for a moment. "Yeah, sounds like fun. We need someone to watch over the equipment, though."

"How about him?" Chris said, pointing over to Brief. "Between you and me, I think he's kind of been slacking off today."

"Sounds like a plan," He picked up the megaphone again. "Hey, you! With the red hair!" Brief looked up at the foreman. "Yeah, you. Stay here and watch the equipment, the rest of us are going to go grab a bite to eat down at the burger joint!" There was a short cheer from the rest of the workers, and they all began piling into the trucks, Chris with them. He gave a short signal to Dan and the girls as he climbed in with the foreman, and they pulled away, leaving Brief alone surrounded by construction tools. Dan, Panty, and Stocking all climbed out of the car, and they made their way over.

"Excellent," Dan said, rubbing his hands together. He unclipped the small walkie talkie from his collar and handed it to Brief. "Here, you hold onto this. Chris'll give you the signal once they're headed back. Make sure you're finished and gone before then."

Brief gave a nod, and started loading all the equipment into one of the trucks that had been left behind. Dan then rushed over to his car, and popped open the trunk. Panty and Stocking looked confused. "What're you doing?" Panty asked.

"You remember yesterday, when you dropped me off to get my car back?" Dan said, rummaging within. "Well, like I explained then, it costed more than the Demon Sisters gave me, so I used Chris's credit card. That left me with $2,000 to spend on whatever I wanted. There was a shop just by the lot that claimed to sell paraphernalia related to demon hunting, so I figured it'd be worth a look." He seemed to find what he was looking for. "That's where I found this baby." He pulled out his purchase, and Panty and Stocking gasped, while Brief nearly dropped the toolbox he was carrying.

Dan was holding a large metal hammer with ornate carvings all over the head and handle. It was rusted, chipped in places, and seemed to be stained with what appeared to be blood. On the face of the hammer was a familiar symbol.

"Hang on a second," Brief said. "That's the same symbol that was scratched into the wall in your apartment!"

"Sure is," Dan said. "The guy in the shop said it belonged to an ancestor of his who had conquered some great evil thousands of years ago. I didn't believe him, of course, but I figured I could at least cause some massive head trauma to those Demon Sisters with it. So, I bought the thing for just short of two thousand dollars, and brought it back with me."

"So let me get this straight," Panty said. "That's the same hammer that your ancestor used to beat the shit out of the Ghost under your building?"

"Probably," Dan said. "And now I'm gonna use it to show the Demon Sisters that they messed with the wrong guy!"

Dan rushed over to the Démon Arms with the hammer in tow, while Panty and Stocking followed in hot pusuit. _Soon_, Dan thought, as he burst through the doors. _Soon I'll finally have my revenge!_


	10. Chapter 9

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter Nine-

Dan, Panty, and Stocking all stormed in through the frosted glass doors and suddenly froze in place, suprised by the sight of the interior of the building. Not one of them had expected anything like this.

The building looked no different from your average upper-class apartment building. A fountain stood in the middle of a large lobby, with a reception desk off to the side of the room, a smiling employee sitting behind it. A pair of elevators were located at the end of the room opposite the entrance, and various statues, busts, and pictures decorated the spacious room, with a rather large portrait of Scanty and Kneesocks hanging between the two elevators being the most eye-catching among them. The whole room carried an elegant red and gold motif.

"Hey, what gives?" Dan said, dropping the large hammer with a heavy thud. "Why isn't this place a giant fortress with ghoulish soldiers posted at every doorway, ready to pounce upon any unlucky soul to venture within?"

"I've gotta admit, I'm a little suprised myself," Panty said, shrugging. "I mean, it's not like those bitches are actually using this place as an apartment building."

"Maybe they figured they could make a quick buck off of some poor saps looking for an apartment," Stocking noted. "Before they tried to pull their little stunt."

"Doesn't really seem like their style..." Panty replied. They all stood pondering for a moment, until they heard a voice.

"Excuse me, I can help you all over here," the receptionist called from the desk. The three all exchanged glances, then walked over to the desk, Dan retreaving the hammer. As they approached, the woman greeted them. "Welcome to the Démon Arms, how can I help you all today?" She didn't seem to be at all concerned that between Dan, Panty, and Stocking, they were carrying a giant hammer, a handgun, and a katana, which struck the Anarchy sisters as unsusual. However, Dan seem to either not care, or not notice, and decided to simply continue talking with her.

"Yes, we're here to see the Demon Sisters on some rather urgent business," Dan said. "Would you be so kind as to direct us to their office, oh kind deskmaiden?"

"I'm sorry, but the Démons aren't taking any calls today, they're too busy organizing tomorrow's demolition of the building next door," the woman replied, still smiling widely. "I can organize an appointment for you, if you like."

"I don't think you quite understand me," Dan said. "We're here to cause them gratuitous amounts of bodily harm, and possibly destroy this building if we can swing it. Now, I'll ask you again. Can you tell us where their office is?" Dan hefted the mallet in a threatening manner.

"I'm sorry, but the Démons aren't taking any calls today, they're too busy organizing tomorrow's demolition of the building next door," the woman replied, still smiling widely. "I can organize an appointment for you, if you like."

"Now see here!" Dan shouted, climbing up onto the desk, albiet with some difficulty caused by his weapon. "I demand you tell me where their office is. You're currently impeding my revenge, and don't think that just because you're a woman-"

"I'm sorry, but the Démons aren't taking any calls today, they're too busy organizing tomorrow's demolition of the building next door," the woman replied, still smiling widely. "I can organize an appointment for you, if you like."

The three of them stared at the woman, confused by her behaviour. Any rational person would be cowering or fleeing at this point, but this woman simply sat there, with a vacant stare and a wide grin.

"Hey Shorty, move for a second," Panty said, raising her gun. Dan stepped to the side, and Panty shot at the woman, the bullet burrowing through her forehead and leaving a clearly tunnel through her cranuim.

"I-I-I-I'm s-s-s-orry-orry-orry, b-b-but the-e-e D-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-" The woman's speech became tinny and disjointed, and her mouth stopped moving to match the words. Her eyes began rolling around in their sockets, and smoke began pouring out of her ears and head wound. Suddenly, her head began to spin on her shoulders at an alarming speed, and a mechanical voice began blaring from her.

"INTRUDER ALERT! ANGELS DETECTED! INTRUDER ALERT! ANGELS DETECTED!" After it repeated this a few times, the head voilently exploded, causing Dan to fall backwards off of the reception desk.

"What the heck was that about?" Dand shouted, picking himself back up and brushing himself off. He looked back to the woman, who was now a headless corpse with a number of singed and frayed wires emerging from the neck. The robot slumped off of the chair and fell to the floor.

"I think it's a safe bet that they were expecting us," Stocking noted. A familiar, yet disembodied voice confirmed their suspicions.

"It seems that, for once, you've guessed correctly," the voice of Scanty said. Dan, Panty, and Stocking all whipped their heads around looking for the source, then eventually located an intercom located in the corner. "Of course, we were almost certain that you wouldn't be foolish enough to waltz in the front door. We had a much more elaborate trap located in the alleyways and back entrance. It's such a shame that it's simply going to go to waste."

"We really shouldn't have expected any better of them, dear sister," the voice of Kneesocks took over. Suddenly, steel plating shot down over the entrance and windows, and the fountain stopped spraying water from its top. "But let's not fret over such minor details. We might as well dispose of them while they're here."

"Oh, of course, dear sister," Scanty agreed. Suddenly, the whole room began to shake, causing a few statues to topple and a few paintings to become dislocated from the wall. "I do hope you all enjoy this little surprise. We bid you adieu!" As Scanty's voice disconnected from the intercom, the shaking stopped. Suddenly, a glowing red liquid began spewing from the fountain, which gave a sinister hiss as it met the water still sitting in the bottom of the fountain. It began to spill over the sides, and the carpet surrounding the fountain burst into flames.

"Shit!" Panty said, jumping up onto the reception desk. "This whole place is filling up with lava!"

"There's gotta be a way out of here!" Dan said, looking franticly around the room. Suddenly, he spotted them. "The elevators! We have to get over to the elevators!" He eyed the pool of lava that was spreading from the fountain, a few statues melting into the molten liquid. "Come on!" Dan took off around the edge of the room, with Panty and Stocking in close pursuit. The lava had spread to cover about half of the room when they got to the elevators. Dan quickly jabbed the button to open the elevator, and steel plating suddenly shot down in front of the sliding doors of both elevators.

"You didn't think it was going to be that easy, did you?" Scanty's voice returned over the intercom. "Now now, I'm afraid that escape is impossible for you all!" Scanty began cackling madly, and Kneesocks took over the intercom.

"I can honestly say that I'm quite disappointed that it had to end this way, angels," Kneesocks said. "I was rather looking forward to slicing you up to ribbons personally, and being able to mount your heads over our mantle. It's such a shame that we won't have any such trophies after you're burned to a crisp. Oh well, such is life."

"And Mr. Dan," Scanty said, returning to the intercom. "I'm sure you'll enjoy Hell very much. Searing pain, endless torment, unbearable agony, all this for all eternity. With any luck, Miss Kneesocks and I will be able to attend to you personally! Won't that be splendid?"

"You listen to me, you pathetic imps!" Dan said. "If I ever see you in Hell you can be sure that you'll regret killing me in the first place!"

"Yes, yes, I'm sure you will," Kneesocks said sarcastically. "However, I'm afraid that we must attend to more important matters right now. We bid you adieu!"

"Those god-damned bondage-loving shit-slurping bitches!" Panty shouted as they signed off. She turned around to see the large portrait of them staring down at her. "If I ever see those bitches again..." Panty aimed her gun at the painting and shot holes through both of their foreheads.

Stocking shared her sister's rage, and lunged at the painting. Rather than meeting the wall on the other side, however, her sword sunk right through the picture, all the way to the hilt.

"What the..." she muttered, and began moving her katana all around the painting, creating a sizable hole. They all looked throught it, and there was a rather fancy looking elevator car on the other side.

"Nice going, Stocking!" Dan shouted. "I'll bet this'll take us up, right to them!"

As if confirming his suspicions, Kneesock's voice returned over the intercom. "What are you doing? Get out of there this instant! Get out of there and die, you fucking mongrels!" The room shook again, and lava began blasting out of the fountain and an even faster rate, almost hitting the cieling. The pool had covered over three quarters of the room now, and spread even faster. "Die! Die! Die!"

"Come on! Everybody in!" Panty shouted. They all climbed in through the hole in the portrait, the lava just coating the floor completely as Dan pulled himself in. They jabbed the button adorned with the Demon Sisters' insignia, and the doors shut. A scream of rage could be heard over the intercom as the elevator began rising. The three simulataniously collapsed on the floor, with a collective sigh of relief.

"Man, that was a lucky break," Dan said, chuckling slightly. "We almost got fried back there. You'd think they'd have the forethought to seal this elevator too."

"Well, it worked out pretty well for us, didn't it?" Stocking said.

"They're a couple of morons, but they're dangerous morons," Panty said. She climbed back up as the elevator came within a few floors of their destination. "Well, are you ready to waste these bitches?"

"I've never been more ready in my life," Dan said, standing up and readying his hammer. "Just let me at them."

The three heroes stood ready as the elevator shuddered to a halt. The doors began to open slowly, and Dan took a deep breath, eagerly waiting to see the Demon Sisters, and exact his vengeance.


	11. Chapter 10

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Chapter Ten-

Kneesocks pounded her fists on the desk as she watched the three heroes climb through the portrait.

"We had them!" She shouted, her face turning to a bright shade of pink. "We had them and they slipped through our clutches like the rats they are!" She let out a scream of rage, and collapsed onto the desk in front of her. "We were so close..."

Scanty, however, didn't seem to be bothered very much by the escape of Dan, Panty, and Stocking. "You're blushing again, dear sister," she said teasingly. "And besides, you were talking about how much you wanted to deal with them personally. Frankly, I'm somewhat relieved that they managed to find our private elevator."

Kneesocks looked up at her sister in disblief. "Relieved?" She repeated. "We were almost rid of those angels that have caused us no end of stress and pain, and you're relieved?"

"You misunderstand me, Miss Kneesocks," Scanty explained, waving her hand. "It's true that I would have loved to see those angels burn, along with that mortal they've decided to drag along. However, you forget that we still have our little ace-in-the-hole. They won't be able to stop us, no matter how hard they try!"

A wicked smile crept onto Kneesock's face. "Of course," she uttered. "How could I have been so foolish?" She straightened herself back up and brushed her hair out of her face. "I do hope you'll forgive me for my behaviour, Miss Scanty."

"It's perfectly alright," Scanty said. She glanced over to the other end of the room, where a set of double doors for the elevator stood. She watched as the indicator above it drew closer to their floor. "Come, Miss Kneesocks, our guests will be here any moment." The two of them walked around from behind the desk and stood in front of it, watching as the elevator finally arrived at their floor.

The doors of the elevator slid open, and Dan, Panty, and Stocking all stepped out. Dan pointed an accusing finger at the Demon Sisters. "Alright," Dan said. "You two have been a lot of trouble to get to, but it's all going to end here, and now. You stole my home. You assaulted me without so much as a warning. You try to boil me alive in a pool of lava. At this point, I don't care that you're trying to unleash some giant horror unto the world. All I know is that you two have messed with the wrong man." He lifted his hammer up. "Now, I'm going to-" Dan stopped suddenly as he realized something. His hammer felt awfully light, almost as if it wasn't there.

Dan quickly whipped around, and saw the antique weapon laying on the floor of the elevator. The doors began to close, and he darted forward to attempt to retrieve it. However, he was too slow, and his face hit the dors shuts as they shut completely. Dan watched the sliver of light through the doors descend downward, all the while shouting "No no no no no no!" as he followed it down until he met the floor. Everybody in the room was staring at him with a perplexed expression on their faces. "Come on!" Dan shouted. "That thing costed be two thousand big ones! I didn't even get to use it!"

As Dan sat hunched over on the ground, cursing his bad luck, Panty and Stocking returned their focus to their enemies.

"So!" Panty shouted, to get their attention. "Are you two ready to finish that fight we were about to have in that restaurant? Because I've been itching to put a bullet right through your fucking eyes ever since we found you out here."

"Not just yet," Scanty said, much to Panty's surprise.

"Not yet?" Panty repeated. "Come on, how can you not be-"

"We just have one minor bit of business to attend to before we begin," Kneesocks explained. She casually walked back around behind the desk, Panty, Stocking, and Dan (having returned his attention to the Demon Sisters) watching her suspiciously. She opened a drawer on the desk, and rummaged around in it until she found what she was looking for. She slid the drawer shut, and walked back around to her spot in front of the desk. "Now, as you're all undoubtedly aware," she began. "We have been trying to be as discrete as possible with this whole business. Erecting this apartment building, purchasing Casa Paradisio through completely legitimate means, even hiring an actual demolition crew to take down the building. However, you all have been making that increasingly hard to do. So, Miss Scanty and I were talking last night, and I said to her 'Miss Scanty, do you really think we should bother with this nonsense anymore? Those angels and that mortal have been giving us no end of trouble.'"

"So I said to my sister 'You certainly have a point, Miss Kneesocks,'" Scanty continued. "'It would be so unfortunate if they thwarted us after all this trouble.'"

"Do you two have a point?" Stocking said impatiently. "Or are you just going to keep wasting our fucking time?"

"Now now," Scanty said. "We musn't rush things. Anyway, that's when we decided that we should have a Plan B. So, we placed an order in the Demon Catalogue, and within a couple hours, we aquired this." Kneesocks held up the object she had retrieved from the desk. It looked like a remote with a sinister gold and black colour scheme, and one large purple button in the center.

Suddenly, Panty's phone began to ring. Looking at the display, she discovered that it was Brief calling her. She opened the phone and began talking. "I'm a little busy right now, Geek Boy!" she said.

"B-b-but Panty, this is important!" Brief said. "I found this wierd looking thing attached to the building, it's all black and gold, but they look like a bundle of dynamite!"

"What? Dynamite?" Panty said.

"Ah, it seems your little friend found them!" Scanty said. "Yes, we took the liberty of ordering a special explosive, in the event that our other plans were impeded. The instant we push this button, that building will be ripped apart by a demonic vortex, along with the ground beneath it. Where it will end up, I can't honestly say, but that's hardly the point. The point is, the Ghost beneath it wil be free, and we'll plunge this world into chaos the likes of which nobody has ever seen!"

"However, there's one last piece of business that we must attend to first," Kneesocks said, placing the detonator on the desk behind her, just on top of a stack of papers. "And that," she continued. "Would be disposing of you." She pointed at Dan.

"I'd like to see you try," Dan scoffed. "Even without a weapon, I can still take you two on with my bare hands. You ready, Panty? Stocking?"

"We've never been more ready," the Anarchy Sisters said in unison.

_Fly away now! Fly away now! Fly awaaaay!_

_"O wicked spirit of a lost soul born in limbo;_

_recieve judgement from the garb of the Holy Virgin;_

_cleansed of worldy impurities;_

_return to Heaven and Earth._

_Repent!"_

Panty and Stocking stood in the middle of the room, each wielding their weapons; Panty with her handgun, and Stocking with her katana. Dan stood for a moment, trying to figure out what had just happened.

"...What was the point of all that?" Dan shouted at the two.

"What?" Panty said. "That's how we always get ready to fight."

"But you already had your weapons out when we were in the elevator!" Dan pointed out. "I've seen you take them out without all the poledancing and stripping and pop music before!" Dan buried his face in his hand. "Alright, you know what? Let's just forget about it. Let's just get going on beating these two to a pulp."

"Now we're talkin'!" Panty shouted. The three of them all dashed towards the Demon Sisters, who in turn ran forward to meet them head on.

It was absolute chaos. Gunshots rang out everywhere. Sparks flew as steel met steel. Both the Anarchy Sisters and the Demon Sisters were darting all around the room. Dan, however, was stuck standing in the middle of the room, unable to keep up with both his partners and his enemies. He would occasionally throw a punch out whenever either Scanty or Kneesocks got close, but they'd always be gone before he could land the hit. "Ugh! This is so stupid!" Dan shouted, getting progressively more frustrated with each missed punch. "How am I supposed to get my revenge if I can't even hit you?"

Just then, something on the desk caught Dan's eye. He turned around, and noticed the detonator to the Demon Sister's special explosives. "That's it!" Dan exclaimed, having thought of a plan. He darted over to the desk and snatched up the detonator. He then noticed a piece underneath it. He picked up the form and examined it. It was the deed to Casa Paradisio! He quickly grabbed it and stuffed it into his pocket, and turned around.

"Dan! Look out!" Panty shouted. He turned to see Scanty hurtling towards him, but he didn't have to move before she crashed into his chest and sent them both crashing through the window. As they flew through the air, they both had just enough time to see just how high up they were before they began to plummet toward the earth.

"Give me that this instant!" Scanty shouted as they fell. She was currently clinging to his shirt with one hand, and grabbing for the detonator in Dan's hand with the other. Dan was trying as hard as he could to push her away from him. He looked down behind him, and saw the awning of the Démon Arms' entrance coming up beneath them.

"I hope this works..." Dan prayed. The two of them landed on the awning, and promptly bounced off onto the ground. Both Dan and Scanty slowly rose disoriented, while several onlookers all stared at them, including Chris, Brief, and the workers they had led away from the building earlier. They seemed to have been in the middle of a heated argument regarding what Brief was doing with their tools, before they saw Dan and Scanty fall out of the sky. Dan looked up, and saw Panty, Stocking, and Kneesocks all leaping down from the window the two of them had just broken through. They all bounced off of the awning similar to Dan and Scanty, and they all rushed over to the pair. Kneesocks helped Scanty up, while Panty and Stocking did the same for Dan.

"Man, that was some fall," Panty said. "You okay, Shorty?"

Dan looked down in his hand, and saw that the detonator was still firmly in his grip. "Never better," Dan said, somewhat dizzily. He looked over to the Demon Sisters, who had apparently lost their weapons when they came down. Panty and Stocking, however, still had theirs, which were now pointed towards the villains.

"Listen up, bitches!" Panty shouted to them. "We've got your last bargaining chip right here, and you don't have any weapons. Now, I'm gonna give you one last chance to pack your shit up and leave. So what's it gonna be?"

The Demon Sisters both looked mortified that they had let this happen, but they eventually admitted defeat. "Alright," Scanty said. "We'll leave. But don't think that this is the last time you'll be seeing us! Thing will be different next time, you can be certain of that." She turned to her sister. "Come along, Miss Kneesocks, let's let these peasants have this victory." She turned around and walked back to the building, while Kneesocks stood and glared at all of them. She followed her sister after a moment, and a secret entrance rose out of the ground in one of the alleyways. As they dissapeared into it, Panty turned to Dan.

"Well that was easy enou-" Panty stopped as she realized Dan wasn't standing there. She looked around, and eventually found Dan running from his building to the Démon Arms with something in his hand. He tossed whatever it was down into the secret entrance, and quickly ran away from it. He returned to the angels' side.

"Watch this," he said with a gleeful tone. They watched as the Demon Sisters' limosine flew out of the entrance, with something stuck to the front of the vehicle. Once it was a short distance down the road, he pressed the detonator. Suddenly, a red and black vortex appeared where the limo was, which quickly swallowed up the vehicle, along with a portion of the road. It closed up just as suddenly as it disappeared, and everybody stared at the spot in utter disbelief. Eventually, Panty and Stocking started cracking up.

"Oh my fucking god, that was excellent!" Panty howled.

"They never even saw it coming!" Stocking laughed.

As the two angels rolled on the ground laughing, Dan walked over to Chris. "So," Dan asked. "How'd everything go with you?"

"Well, okay, I guess," Chris said. "We arrived back a little earlier than expected, and I didn't get a chance to tell Brief. These guys spotted him and asked what he was doing, and the whole situation kind of escalated from there."

"Whatever, I don't really care, I was just being polite." Dan said. He turned to the workers. "Now, as for you all. I take it you're not going to demolish my building now?"

"'Spose not, seein' as how our employers just got sucked into that black hole thing," The foreman explained.

"Good, now get off my property before I sue you all," Dan said, waving the deed in his face.

The next day, Dan, Chris, Brief, Panty, and Stocking were all back at Chris's house, celebrating their victory over the Demon Sisters.

"That was some adventure, huh Dan?" Chris said.

"It was okay, I guess," Dan replied. "I'd probably rate it somewhere in the top ten of all my revenge schemes."

"Well, it was great meeting you all," Chris said to Panty, Stocking, and Brief. They stood by the door, each clutching a piece of luggage. "I hope we can see each other again sometime."

"Yeah, that'd be great!" Brief said. He pulled out a pad of paper and a pen. "What're your email addresses, maybe I could keep you up to date on what we're doing."

"Email address?" Dan asked. "Is that, like, my PO Box or something?"

Everybody looked at Dan. "You know," Chris said. "An email address? On the computer?"

"Oh!" Dan said. "No, I don't have a computer. Never saw the need for one."

"You don't?" Chris said. "That's it, once Elise gets back from her trip we're taking you out to get a computer."

"But I don't need one!" Dan whined. "And I don't want to turn into a giant geek like him!" Dan pointed at Brief.

"Hey!" Brief shouted. "I am not a geek!"

"Oh, shut up, Geek Boy." Panty said. She turned to Dan and Chris "Alright, so, I guess we'll be seeing you guys some other time."

"Oh, yeah, see you later." Dan said. Panty, Stocking, and Brief all picked up their bags and walked out the door. Dan watched them load their bags into See-Through, and they climbed in and took off down the road. Once they disappeared from view, Dan turned to Chris.

"I need you to give me a lift home," Dan said. "I want to sleep in my own bed for a change."

"Alright, alright," Chris said, picking up his keys. The two of them walked out the door, leaving Chris's house empty. There was no indication that there had ever been a pair of angels in the house, planning an assault on a pair of demons. Nothing, except a photograph of three friends watching a blonde woman and a short, dark haired man getting into an argument over something trivial.

**The End**

_Atuhor's Footnose: Well, I hope you all enjoyed this isn't last chapter, though, so stay tuned, because there's an epilogue to come soon!_

_-EverSoNitro_


	12. Epilogue

**Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters**

-Epilogue 1 : Panty and Stocking's Drive Home-

The sun was starting to set as Panty and Stocking were traveling back to Daten City. Brief had fallen asleep in the back seat, which was unfortunate for him, because he was missing a great view. The highway was currently stretching right next to a huge shoreline, and the blazing orange sun was reflecting off of the waves of the ocean. The Anarchy sisters, however, were to engrossed in their conversation to notice the scenery.

"It fucking figures," Stocking said, sliding down in the passenger seat. "We drive all the way out here and work our asses off, and we don't even get any fucking Heavens out of it!"

"Yeah, it fucking bites," Panty said. "One minute, we're having dinner, and suddenly, the fuckin' Afro-Priest gets a call from some bitch saying she's found the Demon dykes out in god-knows-where, and we've gotta drop everything and go."

"And to top it all off," Stocking added, "We get fucking halfway there before we notice that Geek Boy's stashed himself in the back seat," she jabbed her thumb towards the red-head currently blissfully dreaming. "So on top of everything else, we've got to fucking babysit him."

Panty nodded in agreement, then sighed. "Whatever, it all worked out in the end, didn't it? I mean, we got to kick the Demon Sisters square in the asses, plus Dan used that vortex bomb thing to send 'em some place." She gave a short chuckle. "That was fucking excellent, I wish I could've seen their faces."

There was a short period of silence as the conversation drew to a close, then Stocking brought up a new subject.

"So, you never did tell me what happened between you and Dan the other night," Stocking said.

"Nothing happened, would you drop it?" Panty said irratibly.

"Oh come ooonnn," Stocking pleaded. "It's not like you to screw someone and not say anything. Just tell me, okay?"

"I already did tell you, nothing happened." Panty explained.

Stocking paused for a second. "Wait... you mean..."

"That's right," Panty said. "We find a nice quiet spot to screw, I make it pretty obvious that I want his cock, and he fucking leaps out of the car like I just electrocuted him. Then he starts running down the road, trying to get back to the house on foot, and it takes like half a fucking hour for me to convince him to get back in."

"So, bottom line is," Stocking said. "You tried to fuck him, and he shot you down."

"Between you and me," Panty said. "I think he might be gay for that Chris guy."

"I think we all kind of got that vibe," Stocking agreed. "Hell, I'll bet Geek Boy even picked up on it."

Just as his "name" was mentioned, Brief shot up, screaming, causing Panty to lose control of See-Through for a moment and veer wildly to the left. Once she regained control, she turned to the back seat and started shouting at the boy.

"God Geek-Boy, what the fuck is the matter with you?" She yelled. "Are you trying to get us all fucking killed?"

"Oh, Panty, I just had the most awful nightmare!" Brief said, shaking slightly. "You were all chained up, and the mayor was there, and Garter... but then I woke up, and Scanty was there, and the blankets-"

"God, would you get a fucking grip?" Stocking shouted. "So you had some kinky, fucked up wet dream, so what? Just go back to sleep, we'll be back home in about an hour."

"Yeah... sleep... that'll be nice..." Brief muttered, already drifting back off. Once he fell back to sleep, Stocking turned back to Panty. "He's really a fuckin' handful, isn't he?" Stocking said.

"I guess so," Panty said. "Let's just get back home, I haven't had a good fucking in days."

"Ugh, that's more than I needed to know," Stocking said.

They passed a roadsign saying "Daten City: 100 miles" just as the sun slipped below the horizon. They both breathed a sigh of relief, knowing that in just a while longer, they'd be home.

-Epilogue 2: Where Are the Demon Sisters?-

Thousands of millions of miles away, a chunk of concrete drifted through the inky blackness of space. A short distance away, a jet black limosine floated through the void.

"I still can't believe the nerve of those ingrates," Kneesocks said, floating around the cabin of the vehicle. "We peacefully surrender, we take our leave, and they send us to space."

"It's deplorable behaviour, sure," Scanty agreed, drifting about at the other end. "But we musn't dwell on it. We might as well use this time to prepare that report for father."

"We can't work on it here, all of our files are back at home, remember?" Kneesocks pointed out.

"Oh, of course, how foolish of me," Scanty said. She paused for a moment, as if listening for something. "Say, do you hear something?"

"What?" Kneesocks inquired.

"It almost sounds like there's someone calling out to us," Scanty said. "'Hey! Hello! Excuse me, you in the black vehicle! Could you be a sport and help us out?'"

"Don't be ridiculous," Kneesocks said. "We're in space, who could possibly be out there?"

"I suppose your right," Scanty said. She peered out the window, and through the darkness, all she could see was the concrete that had come up with them and a couple pieces of what was probably space junk. "It probably wouldn't be in our best interests to dwell on the matter."

"Of course," Kneesocks said. As she drew closer to the driver's compartment, she knocked on the dividing glass. "Fastener!" She called to the driver. "Take us home, please!"

The red creature occupying the front seat nodded, and pressed a button on the dashboard. A pair of rockets appeared from the back of the limo, and flames shot out of their rear. The vehicle blasted through space at a blistering speed, and was gone from sight in seconds.

"Wait! No, don't leave! Come back! Come..." A voice shouted out, as the vehicle blasted away. "...Shoot, that's just my luck, isn't it?"

The small, round ball shook its shining blue eye back and forth, cursing its luck. "Unbelievable, first people I see out here in weeks, and they ignore me! It's mad! I even saw one of them look at us! ...Although, I suppose they might not have spoken english... they certainly didn't look human, at least from what I saw anyway... maybe I should've tried some sort of... remote communication signal with the... ship's computer... or something. You know, figured out their... hailing frequency... oh well, better luck next time, I suppose." The ball sighed, despite not having a mouth, or lungs. "Better luck next time."

"I'm in space."

"You sure are, lad. Yep... you are in space."

"Space."

_Atuhor's Footnose: Well, it's been a wild ride. Hope you all enjoyed Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters! I'd like to thank you readers that began reading before the story was finished, for seeing it through to the end, and you readers that have just blown through this in an afternoon, for giving the story more attention. I'd also like to thank the creators of Dan Vs. and Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt, for creating two fantastic shows. Here's hoping PSG gets its second season, and Dan Vs. keeps going on strong._

_One note about this chapter: Brief's dream in the Panty and Stocking epilogue is actually a reference to another PSG fanfiction on this site: Just Another Day by kazikamikaze24. It's a fantastic, well written story, though it is a little bit on the gruesome side, so it is not for the kiddies. Still, I highly suggest you check it out, though only if you've seen all of season one, as it contains a few spoilers._

_Also, to anyone that didn't understand the second half of the Demon Sisters epilogue, go play Portal 2. And even if you did understand it, go play Portal 2. In fact, just close your browser right now, and go play Portal 2._

_Alright, so to those of you that are still here, once again, I hope you enjoyed Dan Vs. The Demon Sisters. Later days!_

_-EverSoNitro_


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